


Out of Order (formerly: Well That Was Fun...)

by jdoozi



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Awesome Darcy Lewis, Darcy Feels, F/M, My First Fanfic, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, Steve Needs a Hug, learning as I go, steve is an ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-18
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-03-13 14:14:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3384722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jdoozi/pseuds/jdoozi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A story of a relationship, told out of order.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"What is The Grand Canyon." Darcy answers to the screen as she set her empty plate on the coffee table and adjust her body to drags her knees up and nestles into his side. As if on cue, he leans further into the corner of the couch, Darcy follows. His head resting in the hand of the arm braced and bent on that of the couch. His other arm around Darcy's shoulder. His finger starting in on her hair. She makes a satisfying purr. He lets out a lighthearted puff and let's the sound bring up a corner of his lip. Scooting down for comfort, he brings his feet up on the edge of the coffee table, avoiding his own dirty dish, and crosses them at the ankle.

"Who is Jimmy Carter." Darcy answers again. This has become their norm the last few months. The nights that they meet. Steve orders something in for them to his Brooklyn apartment, they eat, talk about their respective weeks, settle in for a couple hours of post dinner TV watching and food coma cuddling. Followed by rinsing of dishes, then pleasantly familiar and equally satisfying sex before saying their "Good Nights" and Darcy reached for the light on the side table. It was all so simple and beautifully domestic.

He needed an out.

He needed out and there had to be enough finality where it didn't leave this ambiguous space of "cooling off." Only thing is Steve has never really ever been the one to ask a girl out before this, much less break things off. He knew if he didn't stay firm in his resolve he would flounder. It could get messy. He could get messy. It needed to be decisive, sharp and swift.

He pulled Darcy close and pressed his nose to the very top of her head, willing himself to commit her scent to memory, knowing it was all ready there. She responded by tightening the arm now draped over his midsection and giving him a brief squeeze.

' _Quit being such a punk, Rogers. Get it over with. Be fair to the poor girl. The longer you drag it out, the more of the chance of hurt_ ' He mentally chastised himself. He's been meaning to. He knows he should. It's just every time he works the nerve, Darcy's there. She's there saying the absolute right thing or impeccably not saying anything at all after a failed mission. She's there for a quick, adrenaline fueled fuck when the anxious buzz of a day spent being victorious won't subside. Most notably there, managing to curl her small frame around his broad shoulders, all of her soft parts naked and pressed into the taut muscles of his back. Shushing in his ear, chasing the nightmares from the space.

"So..." Darcy tenses as she draws in a breath to finish. Steve cannot see her face but he know her brow is raised and eyes are looking up toward the ceiling. "I've sort of been set up..." The hand that was across the Captain now raised and stiff. Finger splayed and find a new resting point at each syllable and finally curl into a ball when she finishes. She's tense.

"OK? What do you mean ' _set up_ '?" For a man looking for the flashing exit sign, he can't help the feeling in his gut.

"Jane. She said she's growing concern for my, and I quote, 'lack of intimate interaction' and is setting me up. A date for that gala. Tony's gala." By now she has used her balled fist to push against Steve's chest and with an extended arm stays there. Her eyes meeting his. She's not searching. He knows she wouldn't. She has never asked anything of him and he knows she isn't going to start now. God, he was going to miss her.

He nods and pauses.

An eternity ticks by and he wrestles himself. _'THIS IS IT! RUN!'.... 'Who is this kid? Jane could have set her up some undercover Hydra agent for all we know." 'I wonder if Natasha can get a name?'.... 'She is still looking at you. Say something. Anything.'... 'In or out, Cap? This is the time.'_

"Huh, funny that your best friend thinks you lack 'intimate interaction', I don't think there is another person around the ol' office that would ever say Darcy Lewis is short on being fondled." Well that was not the least bit mature. Still, he's willing to see if the bait is nibbled on.

"What was _THAT_ suppose to mean, exactly?" Her eyes narrow and her chin sharpens, pointing out in curious reflection.

Of course she is giving him the benefit of the doubt. No one would expect what was going to out of his mouth next. “Come on, Darcy. You're the one saying her face is too far into her calculation to even acknowledge the rest of the world exist. Is it really that hard to believe all the male attention and flirting you so blatantly let go on in the tower, goes unnoticed by her? I mean Clint alone...the thing you two get up to, right in the labs, would lead anyone to believe that you're getting plenty of interaction.” He surprises himself with how close to the surfaces that lashing out was. He knows what she and Clint (she and everybody, really) have was harmless. He knew Darcy was a touch heavy person. Once he learned not to turn seven shades of Red every time she did it, he learned to love it. You would be surprised how a bunch of Hero-complex suffering, World saving, angst ridden group of Superheros really could benefit from a friendly touch. A hand squeeze while passing her desk, a quick shoulder massage on the way to and from debriefings, a big bear hug while passing in the hall. It was enough to make them feel human. What he says next makes him feel less so. “I'm just surprised she doesn't see you all over the guys, like you get.”

Silence.

He was starting to hate himself.

Steve is pinned by her blank stare. For not wearing any emotion on her face, it speaks volumes. Even he is maybe a little dumbfounded at how he's going to play this. I guess the traditional 'It's not you, it's me.' is out of the question now.

“Wow. Wait? Whoa. Huh? Wait, WHAT?! Where did that come from, Rogers?! Really, where? I was just telling you about this... this set up, Jane is wrangling me into, out of respect for you. You will be at the very same Gala, didn't want to spring it on you and you pull all this out? How long have you been sitting of that pile?” To his relief she is not as mad as even he feels she is allowed to be at his implication that she is the team floozy. Her face still processing. “Wait? Are you jealous, Steve?”

“You're not my girlfriend.” He spits out. It sits there. Harsh. It is at this that the conversation starts to pick at Darcy's outer layer and he goes to soften it just as she begins to speak.

“I am well aware of what this situation is and is not but THANK YOU for the very stern reminder. And you're right. I am not your girlfriend so therefore I do not feel the need nor even the desire to get to the bottom of your sudden implication that I am some sort of slut.”

"Darcy-" Floundering be damned. He definitely hates himself now. Honesty, good old fashion honesty, WEEKS AGO, could have prevented the bitterness radiating off her now. None of this was her fault. He was a wimp.

"No. You don't get to take back anything you just said. It's out there, Buddy! Where are my shoes?" She gets off the couch and begins to gather her things.

"Darcy, seriously. Let me start over. I've been meaning to talk to you for awhile actually. This. This all... it just came out wrong. I'm a coward..." It is a little late for the high road but he's going to try and grasp it while he still has her in his apartment. He's up off the couch. Following her around the living space as she gathers up her belongings strung across the open floor plan. He stands at the bathroom door and she goes into the small medicine cabinet, grabbing her contacts case and spare tooth brush. She shuts the mirror and catches his eyes.

"You are. Don't think I didn't know this was all coming, Cap. I can tell you the exact moment it changed. You are a coward but not just for how you handled this. Get over yourself, would ya?!" She walks pass him to the door. She turns. "I know you don't fancy yourself much a hero but if you were being honest, you're not living much of Steve Rogers, either. Time to finish thawing out, Cap. Start living here in the now, with the rest of us. Happily." She leaves out the door.

Surprisingly enough, what he feels now is anger. Deep, kick in the gut anger at himself. Maybe a little at her for not seeing through it all and calling him on it. For her finally having enough of his blunders and old man sulking to leave. He wants to hit something. He is keyed up and shaking out his hands when there is a firm knock at the door. He looks through the peep hole to see Darcy. Arms crossed over her chest, tongue between her lip and top teeth, pulling a deep breath through her nose and letting it lift her chest. Steve is unable to see her feet but he is almost certain she is stomping her foot. He rest his forehead on the door. He wants so bad to open it and drop to his knees. Explain everything, beg her to stay and he would spend the rest of the night apologizing by way of making love.

He won't. Can't. He needs to build a wall.

He opens the door and only offers her raised eyebrows in from of a question. She storms passed him. "I forgot my phone." She heads to the breakfast bar and pulls the charger connected to both the phone and the wall outlet and stuffs it in her messenger bag.

He wants to close the space. Kiss her.

She makes her way back to the door, before she gets there he opens it for her and leans into it with his shoulder. Snark, mean snark comes to him now. Chance to further push. "Here I thought you came back to grovel."

"Screw you." She says as she goes to pass him.

"No Sweetheart, You've already done that. Time to service the next Superhero." He sweeps his hand out as if ushering her out into the hall. She stops, quickly slaps him, hard, across the cheek. They both still for two counts and she carries on back out the door. For possessing super strength he is not sure if he felt the sting of the slap as hard as he did because it was, in fact, that hard or he felt he deserved the pain.

"Mission accomplished, Captain Asshole" He says to no one.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A story of a relationship, told out of order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how you all do this! I wrote this the day after my last post and I had to let it sit all weekend to let it breath and allow space to switch it up. I have to post or I'll never be happy with it enough to post.
> 
> Also, if Darcy's position with the team seems vague, it is meant to be that way. I would have even gone more vague had her dialogue not kinda got away from me. Bare with me.

If Steve Rogers were capable of a hangover, it would feel like this. No. This was worse, actually. A hangover would lessen. A little food, some sleep, or maybe a little 'hair of the dog' should it come to that. No. This was worse. This was the affirmation that he would always feel the need to do what he feels right over going for what he wants. He felt like shit and pushing away the only person he would want to talk about it was the cause.

Darcy. Oh man. The things he said. The things he didn't even mean. He had to. He knew if he didn't kick and push till she broke, she would forgive him. She would get to the bottom of everything. She would approach it with her usual way of understanding with no nonsense reflection and cause him to waiver in his stance that they could not nor should not ever really be.

His morning run didn't help. If anything, coming home from it only made the feelings worse. The nights that Darcy would stay, he would come back from his run and crawl back into bed with her. Simply slipping behind her, wrapping a steady arm around her, drawing her close, placing kisses into her hair and down the curve of her neck. When that alone didn't cause her to stir, he would drape his bare chest across her and playfully nudge, kiss and caress her until she started to come around. He had done a lot of incredibly brave and equally stupid things in his life. None more brave nor stupid than purposely waking Darcy Lewis. He figured out early on that the term 'Morning Person' would never, ever be used to describe her. He went as far as fearing for the safety of anyone who referred to themselves as such, in Darcy's presence, before her second cup of coffee. So he quickly adapted the 'nudge and fondle' technique. It would usually lead to many lascivious morning make-out sessions. Passionate from both parties if not a little sleepy on her behalf. Yet, He always, always tried to see how far he could take it before she would complain about his sweaty, sticky torso. She would begin pushing him away. Sometimes going as far as trying to get a good leg in and kick him to the floor. She had succeeded twice in all of the mornings she woke up in his bed but they both know it was only because she waited and caught him at the height of arousal. She was a dirty cheat and he liked it. By the time she would refuse any further contact until he had a shower, he would be grinning ear to ear. It was then he would pull back the covers, leaving her completely exposed. He would reach down, swoop her up and hoist her over his shoulder. Both would be aroused and laughing on the way to finish things in a shared shower.

After being deemed clean from something Darcy referred to a some "suds n rubs" (only to have the good Captain start using the name himself and remind her that she was a filthy minded influence) there would be shared time in front of the mirror. Dressing in his room. Talking about their days ahead. Gathering of bags and one final kiss shared before opening the door. She would turn up her nose on the Subway at his offer to share his vile protein drink concoction, he would look down his at her choice of breakfast pastry from the cart taking up residence in front of the Tower.

He sighs "The Tower" he says. He remembered agreeing to meet Tony today. He was going to have to go to the Tower today. He hated himself.

 

~*~

_"So how much can you tell me about this Lewis fellow, anyways?" He asked across one of the Tower's conference room tables to Tony who was standing and fiddling with some sort of tablet._

_"Lewis fellow? Wait, have you not met the Kid yet?" No. Steve hadn't. It irradiated him to no end. Someone was coming onto the team, HIS team and he had never even met the guy. This guy wasn't even going to be given an official title. Not even a position, really. Tony had described it as something likened to a school Guidance Counselor of sorts. Steve didn't see much need for someone to stand around and pass out aptitude test, never mind the person doing so was obviously here based on clean cut nepotism. Apparently being friends with Thor was enough to earn you a pretty cushy job through S.H.I.E.L.D. and since Coulson liked him, Tony liked him and Thor gave his stamp of approval on behalf the Avengers, this nobody 25 year old was going to have unbridled access to him and his team. He didn't like it._

_Tony went to continue when something just outside the glass wall of windows, overlooking the conference room's reception areas caught the billionaire's eye. Steve moved his own to follow Tony's gaze._

_Well bless his Stars and Stripes. There stood the most alluring and full backside he had ever seen. His slow, appreciative once over started just above her heels, following the milky skin of her calves upwards. A Navy pencil skirt tightly drawn over generous thighs and sloping up over the supple curve of a truly remarkable rear, finally coming to rest fitted over lush swells of feminine hips. The skirt, currently to very unholy things to his sensibilities, was cinched in at the waist with a thick red belt that served to bridged the connection where a crisp, white sleeveless button down was tucked. Her back still turned to him and the softest deep brunette waves fell around her shoulders and began the descent down her back, stopping just above where her breast would be had she been facing him. Heat started to rise. '_ Oh God _.' he thought. '..._ her breast _.' The realizations that there was going to be more to take in, more to gawk over, washed over him. His hungry eyes ready to devour more at the very same time swallowing became a daunting feat. Every ounce of his super strength worked to pull the pooled drool from the tip of his tongue, ball it, roll it down behind his bobbing Adam's Apple and further down the hatch. If he was any frame of mind to even remember Tony was still in the room, he would have checked to see if the swallow was as loud as he heard it to be._

 _The mark of his intent admiration remained blissfully unaware that America's Sweetheart was admiring her as if he should be considered anything but. She goes about her task arranging papers into the manila_ _files she is balancing in one hand, being without the benefit of a surface to lay them on. As if only to tournament the now strain on his pants where an undeniable bulge forms, one of the balanced files topples to the ground and scatters its contents._

_He is a dirty, dirty old man for relishing in the thought that she was going to have to reach to pick every last bit up. He prides himself on holding back the urge to wet his lips in anticipation. Ever so slowly she begins to bends. Angels surely looking down, begin to warm up their windpipes, ready for a full blown choir chant from above when the space in assaulted by a low, slooooow and seductive wolf-whistle. The woman stops abruptly. She shoots back up. Steve's trance is broken. His head swimming. He shoots an accusatory glance at Tony but can see his concentration has been equally faulted. He looks back into the reception area in time to see Clint come into view._

_The archer is mischievously grinning and saunters over to the woman. Steve doesn't really have much room to talk since he isn't exactly innocent in eyeing the unaware girl up, down and over again. He certainly wasn't anything like a howling wolf cartoon, Steve remembers from the '40s. but still. The way Clint owns his appreciation for the beauty, willing giving it. Leaves Steve both envious and offended._

_Before Steve can think to defend her honor, she sends playful smack to the hard form of Clint's chest as he is soon grinning and leaning into her. Clint's hand pressed into her lower back and gently whispering something in her ear. He pulls back, still grinning. Steve wants, so badly, to help his teammate get his face back to a neutral state by any means necessary. Then, without warning, the woman is raising the still palmed folders and simultaneously using them to hit and shoo the laughing man away. She turns, slightly, for good measure to ensure Clint's retreat and Steve catches sight of those lips. Lips he is sure to dream about. Full, plump and begging to be kissed. Dressed up in Red lipstick and stretched across a broad smile, showing that Clint flirtation was met in good fun._

_If it weren't for a second assault to his concentration from the Casanova, he would still be fixed upon the knockout still outside the conference room_

_"Ahh, nothing like a little Double-D-Darce to get the blood pumping in the morning. Huh, fellas?" Clint announces broadly to the room as if it weren't just Steve and Tony in there. OK, Steve was_ not _that bad in his appreciation of the gal._

_"Man, that one. I tell ya." Tony wiggles his eyebrows. "All wits and sass as much as she is tits and ass." A sigh. "Thus, however, too young for me and Pep is really holding out on this whole threesome idea." Steve is ready to put a stop to the direction of conversation when he is met with a voice at the door._

_"OK, now that is just uncalled for." Dr. Banner directs at Tony and using a very scolding brow. He enters the room with a cooling cup of Green Tea in hand and sits at one of the very first seats around the table. He was the remaining Avenger left to join them for the meeting with Natasha on mission and Thor, well wherever it is Thor went off to when he wasn't in the Tower. All they need to begin was this Agent Lewis._

_Late and an unwelcome presence. Great._

_"What's uncalled for?" It was her.  Much to his surprise, his annoyance and the now late Agent Lewis cause him to forget about the decidedly more appealing distraction outside. "You know what? Forget that I asked." She says with a raised palm and closed eyes. She opens them again to begin. "Gentlemen." She offers into the room as she nods and crosses the threshold.  "...and aside from Dr. Banner, here, I use that term loosely." She stands behind the Doctor and puts both hands on his shoulders with a friendly squeeze. Steve stands to greet her. She is still slightly bent into the greeting with Bruce and Steve notices the top few buttons of her collar shirt are undone. A bra, Navy, the color near matching that of her skirt pokes through._

_Oh.... Right.. Her breast. Breast. Breast. Breast. He was too distracted to risk a peek when she turned to swat Clint. Memorized by her lips..... Which were know forming words..... Directed at him. 'Snap back to it, Steve!" his head commanded._

_"...hopefully is a title we can included one more too. We have yet to be introduced. Sir, I'm Agent Lewis." She extends a hand towards the Captain._

_This is Lewis?! Lewis. The man he had already resolved to hate not more than twenty minutes prior. He is thrown. He extends a hand. "Agent Lewis." He offers in greeting. "I'm Captain Breast." Oh God... Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. He said it, didn't he? He really said it.... and NOW he was looking at them ' STOP LOOKING AT THEM, STEVE!" the demand from his brain to his eyes does nothing. He stares, stutters and then stammers. He finds the courage to lift his eyes to hers. Oh God. She doesn't look amused, probably because NONE of this is funny! He burns with heat of a thousand fires up his neck and across his cheeks. "Rogers! I am Captain Rodgers. I am so very sorry for that Ma'am... I..."_

_She cuts him of, taking hold of his extended hand and carrying on with the interrupted handshake, calling over her shoulder to Bruce as she maintains eye contact with Steve. "Nope Dr. Banner. I was right, you're the only one." She drops his hand and turns to the table. "Now, if everyone is done having a good time, may we please get this HR nightmare of meeting under way._

_"Hold on." Tony says. Steve is reminded, once again, he forgot anyone else was in the room. Not very solider like to show such disregards for his surroundings. He really must have been wrapped up. Steve dares a look. Clint stands bugged eyed and slacked jaw. Steve wagers that is at least better than laughing but only marginally because he is sure it take a decent amount to shock the Special Agent. Bruce is slowly shaking his head into his tea, which Steve declares IS much worse than laughing. The disappointment worn on the older man's face very apparent. Then there is Tony. Tony's head tilted, slightly to the ceiling. "JARVIS, Please rewind and record both video and audio surveillance from the very start of Captain Rogers and Agent Lewis' exchange and send it to my private file storage. Thank you." He offers a wink to Agent Lewis and claps his hands together "OK, NOW we can begin."_

_The Agent rolls her eyes and moves to pass out the Manila folders._

 ~*~

He enters the elevator. "Jarvis, Can you tell me if Agent Lewis is in the building?" He ask outloud.

"Agent Lewis does not appear to be in the Tower, Captain Rogers." The AI returns.

A small relief. "Jarvis, Please inform me should Agent Lewis arrive. Please don't tell her I asked you to do so."

"Certainly, Captain Rogers."

A Goddamn coward.

 

~*~

 _"Agent Lewis?....Ma'am?" He knocks on the soft wall of her cubicle. Apparently being friends with Thor didn't offer_ that _cushy of a position. At least the second desk in the small space was unoccupied. It allowed it to feel a little less cramped._

_It had been three hours since their first meeting. Steve needed to time get over his mortification just slightly enough to apologize and then to find her through the sea of grunt workers at S.H.E.I.L.D.'s New York offices._

_"Little late for the 'Ma'am'. Ain't it, Captain Breast?" She only looks up from her typing as she finishes. She gives him a curt but professional smile and finished with raised brows. That smile dripping with less than friendly subtext is still single-handley, the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. Thick rimmed glasses now adorn her face and all of her hair swept up on to top of her head. She gives a pointed nod indicating he may enter her space and he leans against the empty desk on the other side of the cubicle. Not to be outdone, she stands so with the way his improvised seat causes a slight slouch and her maintaining full height, they are nearly meeting eye to eye. Her arms crossed over her chest._

_"Before you begin Captain, please allow me to say something first, if I may?" He pulls his eyes from the floor to meet hers and nods. She continues. "Let first address that I am more than picking up the vibe that you're putting down. That whole disapproving Grandpa thing radiates off of you. I get it. You don't want any outside influence to help along the comradery of the team. Especially not from anyone who has, may or may not, nearly talked a certain Norse God into forming a two-man '80 cover band and naming ourselves Thunder and Lightning. Am I correct?"_

_He hadn't heard any of this. He stifles the urge to smirk. Nods in reposes._

_"You certainly don't seem on board with the notion that a lowly office grunt, fairly recent College grad with a Poly-Sci degree has anything to offer the team? You feel my presence would only serve to be continually underfoot and you're extremely concerned with how an unknown variable is going to fit with all the sudden access to the inner workings of a fiercely private group of people?"_

_He nods again._

_"Allow me to stop you there." She interjects as if the conversation had at all been two sided. "I was not assigned to this as a job. I was not given this as an assignment. I. sought. out. the. task. I. took. the. initiative. I was the one to run the prospect of such a position through the higher-up. I am certain that Nick Fury wanted to shoot me. Plain and simple. I guess suggesting that his prized heroes could use some of the "touchy-feelies" was enough to make his good eye twitch.  I would do it again! For private people, you guys aren't exactly subtle, if a person with my clearance level and access to Youtube can see the need for normalcy._

_For the love of Odin, you guys are running around like an unfunny, more attractive remake of the Breakfast Club."_

_He lifts an eyebrow with a tilt of his head as if to pose a question._

_"It's a movie, Dude. Add it to your list."_

_He nods for her to continue._

_"When you're all not 'Oh, I am so angsty and emo. Meh.'," She using a definite "tone" there and childishly uses her tongue at the end to emphasize her intended emotion. "You guys are having these proverbial 'Who's Pecker is Bigger' contest. Which is silly because everyone know it's Natasha's. Duh."_

_Again a suppressed smirk from the Captain._

_"Is it so far fetch to believe a little neutral ground for all, might actually help the morale? I am not a shrink. I am not here to file any official report. I am just human, like you guys. Well most of you, most of the time, anyways._

_Also, while I have you here, let me say, why yes, I am sure my kinship with Thor may have gotten my foot in the door here, it is not how you may assume._

_When you're able to handle doombots falling from the sky out in the real world and merely refer to it a crappy day, you become more than equipped to call it 'just another day in the office' around here." She gestures around the room with bent arms and upward facings palms. "Understood?"_

_He nods._

_"Now, about this morning..."_

_He steels himself._

_"I have many former professors that would beg the notion that you, Captain Rogers are nothing of the 'ah, shucks, Ma'am. Can I slice you a fresh piece of good ole Apple Pie?.' We have been lead to believe all these years" She performs what he assumes is her attempt at a Country twang and obviously a well rehearsed Captain America mock routine. He gives her his first non-passive facial expression since she began speaking. She quickly picks up on it and she stays on course. "My point being, Captain, is this the kind of tomfoolery I can expect from you on a regular bases? Or am I right in believing you actually are that hopeless? Which by the way, the pained look on your face right kinda answers that but I am going to ask anyways. Before you answer, remember that I once tasered an Actual God I will not hesitate to take down a National Treasure. Can I expect anymore 'oh so mature' boob jokes in the near future, Captain Rogers?"_

_"No." He meets her eye._

_"Okay." She gives a peppy nod._

_"Okay?" He questions._

_"Do I have a reason to believe you're being dishonest?" She ask._

_"No." He offers._

_"No?" She chides_

_"No." He confrims._

_"Okay. You're dismissed Solider." She give a genuine smile._

_He snaps to his comand and turns on his heal to leave the space. He has a foot crossed the opening when his senses kick back in and he remembers his mission at hand. He puts a hand out to the collapsible wall and stops himself. He swings around and Darcy still stands, watching his retreat. "Excuse me, Agent but I actually came her to apologize. I am incredibly sorry and I didn't...." His hand to the back of his neck. Wringing it feverishly and eyes find themselves slowly being cast to the floor._

_She cuts him off. She reaches for the arm working at his neck. She uses both of her hands to lower it. She rest one hand on his bicep and one on his forearm. She waits till he is ready to establish firm eye contact. "I know you are and I know you didn't." She smiles again warmly. He returns it and carries on his way._

_"And call me Darcy!" she calls after him._

_He walks out into the makeshift halls of cubicles.  Dazed and stunned at the events that just transpired. Why the hell does he feel like he just left the Principal's office and why does it turn him on so much?_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A story of a Relationship, told out of order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this Chapter was... bulky
> 
> If you're reading through this and think, did you really just pose two more big questions before we have finished answering all the one currently on our plates? Yes, yes I did. (read end notes for more) Call it incentive to see if anyone is willing to stick with this boat till the end! muhahaha!
> 
> Next chapter will be set entirely in the past and oh man, the question answering will feel so good!
> 
> Real quick, in case it is not obvious.  
> Italic = past (or the character thinking within the narration but you got that much.)  
> Regular font = present.

The suckiest part of no one knowing about your sorta-kinda relationship thing is you sorta-definitely don't have anyone to talk about it with when your sorta-kinda relationship definitely ends.

It had been four days. Darcy was looming between her "I am so effing pissed right now!" and the "I need you to pretend you never existed for awhile" of her post-break-up phases. Truth be told the anger was having its occasional slip.Though it was still very much present and lurking.  She knew as hard up for a friendly ear with the inside track as she was, Steve was going to be even more hard pressed to find one. Then the anger would kick in and remind that Steve was in need of a friend because four days ago he strapped his  _best_ friend onto a roller coaster that should be aptly named "Random and aimless emotional whiplash, possibly fueled by underlying male jealousy or maybe not. Maybe something else. Probably something else."  

Ugh, there it was again. The slight slip in the anger. What in his actions should let her even care that she knew he was hiding something? Something more. So she knows Steve better than anyone else on the planet? That gives him no excuse, in fact it makes it more deplorable! Yet, she does know him better than anyone. IF this was something she felt she wanted to get to the bottom of, she was certain there would something to find

Man, her "Denial isn't a good look for anyone, Darcy" phase is going to be so guilt ridden..... For now, however, he was making her miss out on cake! Cue anger!

After a careful avoidance of the Tower for days, Darcy knew she eventually was going to have to start making her haunts again, if only to avoid questions from forming. She remember a planned lunch date with Jane. Usually she loved lunch at the Tower. It had the best Chocolate cake in the City. Darcy had fantasies involving this cake. Dark, rich and dense. Three things Darcy also use to claim to be looking for in a life partner. All found in this marvelous culinary wonder. A decadent delight. A true triumph of flour and sugar. However, thanks to Captain Jerk, she will be convincing Jane to go out to lunch.

"Geeze. Are you sick? Why do you look like that?" the waif scientist spat out in lieu of a traditional greeting.

"Uh, this is my _face_ but thank you." Darcy says pointing with her finger as she moves to take off her coat. "I am glad to see that copy of 'idiot's guide to basic social interaction, outside the realm of SCIENCE!' I put in your John at Christmas is getting a throughout thumb through though." She tries not to clip the end in form of a insult too much. Jane doesn't deserve any displaced anger reserved for Captain Butt.

"Ouch. Let's get you some cake."  She really doesn't give Jane enough credit. She isn't totally lame when it came on picking up on moods nor being sympathetic to them.

"No!" She shouts and Jane's eyes go even wider than they had at Darcy's quip. "No, I uh just uh thought we would try this place I saw on the walk over. Cute little place, you can even sit outside!" Darcy was going to go ahead and say she pulled a pretty smooth landing from that turbulence.

"A) It's cold out. B) You hate outside and you definitely hate cute." Jane reminds.

"I know but I umm, have been trying to eat better, ya know? Like salads and crap." Yep, smooth. No sudden emotional outburst over the lost of cake and the Captain Stupid that caused it. 

"Oh. OK. Well that explains the crankiness. Let me get my coat." Newly content with reasonable explanation, Jane walks over to her work space and swings the light coat from the back her chair and onto her shoulders. As she begins to thread her arms in, JARVIS chimes in.

"Agent Lewis. You wished to be inform should Captain Rodgers arrive. I would like to inform you that he is on the elevator and currently en route to the 43rd floor."

"I said AS SOON AS he arrived, JARVIS! NOT COOL!" Darcy looks back at Jane who's acceptance of earlier explanation was fading. "Uh, That's OKAY, J. We were actually just on our way out."

Jane stands with her head tilted and a question worn on her face. "Why did you want to know if Steve was here?"

Darcy goes to swing on her own coat. "Not important. Team babysitter business. Are you ready? I thought in light of my very recent health binge we could start with a jog to the stairs and take them down. Come on! Away we go!" Darcy pulls the frightened woman's hand towards the door. Just as she straddles the space between the hall and the lab, Jane pulls back.

"Darcy! That is 43 floors! We are not taking the stairs! What the hell has gotten into you?!" Darcy turns to her friend who has freed her hand from Darcy's grip and is now standing expectantly with her arms crossed. Darcy almost cracks, she does, she almost spill the whole sordid story right there. Then the ding alerting that the elevator car has arrived chimes. Desperate for a hiding place and realizing there is none, Darcy lunges forward and embraces Jane into a big hug. Jane is slow to return the gesture but once does, Darcy uses the frightened Scientist's arm to further hide her face in Jane's shoulder. Knowing she is still very much in view of the lift's door through the labs window panels. It's very much a toddler playing a game of 'If I can't see you, you can't see me' but it's all she's got at the moment. Cue phase 'I need to pretend you never existed...'

"Oh Jane! Thank you for saving me from my misguided attempt to be healthy! We all remember that stint last April where I thought cutting out pop-tarts may actually be for the best! Thank you, Jane! I am just so happy to be going to lunch with you!" Darcy holds her stance. Jane brings up her hand and begins to pet long strokes over Darcy's smooth strands. Actual concern hard to miss in the gesture. Darcy realizes this is what she actually needs. A hug. She relaxes into it. Captain America was an asshole.

Another full minute ticks by and Darcy sneaks a peak toward the elevator. Hall cleared. She pops her head up. "OK! Already to go? I'm buying!" She cheerfully announces.

"Darcy Ann Lewis! We are not going anywhere until you tell me what is the name of my boyfriend's Dad, that was all about! I mean it! Are you on drugs?!" Loud is not a level Darcy wants Jane at right now but that what she's got.

"What? No! Drugs, Jane? Really? ...Really?" She has the audacity to look at the concerned woman as if she is the crazy one.

"Well what then? Spill it!" Clearly Jane picked a hell of a day to get her head out of those calculations.

"Ugh, FINE! but not here! I will tell you over lunch. Out. I will tell you over lunch, OUT of the Tower." Darcy concedes.

"Okay then." Jane nods. "Let's try out this cutesy little outdoor spot of yours."

"Eww. God no! I'm pretty sure they don't even serve alcohol." With that, they make their way to the vacant elevator.

 

_~*~_

_"Why do I feel as if I should be pulling out my dogeared copy of 'He's Just Not Into You' and preparing myself to sully your name at some Wine fueled binge thinly veiled as a 'Girl's Night In'?" Darcy sat on both knees, parallel to the back of the couch, facing Steve._

_"Wait. I don't even know a third of what you just said." He says shaking his head, eyes closed as if asking for a rewind. Being clueless wasn't a new revelation for Steve but Darcy fought her usual pleasure at his 'behind the times' displacement. To be honest, this time she was a little afraid where this conversation was headed._

_"It's a book. No, it's not worth the list and the title says it all." She continues. "Wine. Its a fermented liquid made from the nectar of..." He give her a face, she stops. "Oh, excuse me. Sometime I forget how long 70 years ago was and what you guys did or did not have." She still not taking pleasure in how the face he was making deepens. She actually IS afraid of this conversation. It had been about a month and half since she and Steve started sleeping together. Six weeks since the first laughing and stumbling through their first undressing. Only to be met with some seriously intense S-E-X as the night went on and turned into morning. It had only been 6 weeks and while she was not thinking marriage or anything, she knew she was still definitely up for some fun. Steve was that. That indeed. It wasn't just his super strength making every move ever published in any version of the Kama Sutra ever possible and recoil time non-existent, she also happened to enjoy his company. Sue her. He was sweet. He treated Darcy unlike any other boy his age that she had ever been with. Probably because he was really 94 and that alone made him a head case of gigantic portions but as far as 20-somethings went, he was a notch above._

_Then again, he was really the last thing Darcy needed. Sleeping with an Avenger? Gaw! How cliche was she?! It didn't matter that it started as innocently as Boy meets girl, boy makes a horrible slip of the tongue about the girl's chest, girl thinks boy isn't so bad maybe even kinda cute... kinda super hot actually, fluff ensues and before you know it they're bumping uglies. Classic tale as old as time. Expect Darcy fought daily against the idea she was only a S.H.E.I.L.D. Agent because she and Thor were major bros. Not to mention she had been fighting the 12 years since she grew boobs that she was somehow a ditz because of a huge knocker gene from her Dad's side. Sleeping with the Captain was sure to only perpetuate the idea that Darcy only (in the words of the incomparable Samantha Jones) 'got ahead by giving head'. '_ Of course she would start a _'thing'_ with one of the guys she wiggled her way to get a position closer to. Probably working towards her MRS. Degree and what a Degree that would be, being Captain America's trophy wife... _' at least that is what they would be saying. No she worked too damn hard for that happen! She needed to let whatever Steve was getting at happen. She squared her shoulders. "I'm sorry. Go on."_

_"First let me address; how could you think I'm not into you?! Seriously, Darcy?" He reached for her and she let him. She took his out reached hand awkwardly crawled into the seat of his lap he was guiding her into. Her body perpendicular to his."Darcy. Please don't think that was or is ever the case with you. Look at me." He rest his index finger under her chin and rest his thumb just above. Turning her head gently. "Before all this. " He motions his free hand to his person and then sliding it up her outer thight, resting it there as his other hand now snakes around her back. The placement of both arms is slightly caging her into his embrace. "Before the serum. I couldn't get a dame like you to give me the first glance, let alone the second. Then you had a mouth to put any man to shame? A brain and big as your rack? Being INTO you is not the problem here, Darce." Then in the least creepy way to do a totally creepy thing, he shifts her so she is sure to feel what the close proximity is doing to Washington Monument. "I know you're S.H.E.I.L.D. but I don't expect you to understand. I don't really feel like I get to hang my cowl at the end of the work day. I feel like I am always Captain America, expect for when I am with you but where and how does that fit in? What does that do to a relationship? Not to mention the danger of it all. The target it would make you? No. I wouldn't be able to come back if..." he trails off._

_'_ Okaaaay?' _Darcy thought. '_ Oh, right. NOT your typical 20 something.' _What Darcy was interrupting as '_ It's been fun but...' _was actually '_ It's been fun but... I could potentially getkilled on assignment one day OR you could get taken by some world domination hungry Super Villain and I don't think potentially identifying each other's bodies at the morgue really constitutes 'til death do us part.' _Yep. NOT your typical 20 something. So Steve saw it best to end it. She could respect that, she guesses. Man, total bummer! Unless...._

_"Huh, well we could always be covert. There is always the 'Fuck Buddy' option." She offers sheepishly. The hand on the outside of her outer thigh shoots to pinch the bridge of his nose. He gives his head a slow three swipes back and fourth while letting go of one long exhale._

_"Nope, nope, nope." He says quietly and to no one as he lifts her to set her in a seated position back on her original cushion. So maybe she read THAT one wrong... "Stay there." He says making a 'stop' gesture with his palm. He crosses the space from the living area to his kitchen. She can see over the breakfast bar that he is opening the fridge. She hears the clank of bottles and then the popping of tops. He comes around the bar holding two of the dark beers she has turned him onto. They do nothing for him but he likes the taste and he says the ritual is calming. He hands her one before sitting. His bum near the edge of his cushion, back straight and both feet planted firmly on the floor. He takes a long pull of the cold bottle. He rubs the palm of his free hand over his jeans. A gesture Darcy recognizes as someone drying a sweaty palm. He begins. "Okay. Now. What's a 'Fuck Buddy' exactly?" He looks at his bottle, decidedly not at her._

_Riiight. That miiiiight be a newer term. Oops. "Oh. Well.. a... ya know. Is kinda a casual thing. Late night text saying 'Hey, heading home from the bars. Are you still up? Want some company? ' sorta thing. Nothing really much else to it then that." This can go on record as the first time she had to present the concept of a Fuck Buddy to a potential Fuck Buddy._

_"No. I don't want that." Whoa dude. Way to be direct, she thinks. "I don't like the lack of non-sexual interaction. Is there anything else?"_

_"Huh? Another casual sex arrangement? Uh, well..I guess there is 'Friends with Benefits?'" She says with a pulled lip and raised brow. This was her life?_

_"Yes! That one! That sounds good. What comes with that one?" His finger shoots in the air._

_"STEVE! Your not buying car insurance packages!" As incredibly adorable as this is, COME ON! Seriously, guy? Seriously?!_

_He looked kicked and sullen. His hand started to work on the back of his neck. "I'm sorry, Darce. I'm not good with, well, any of this really. To be honest, I feel really in over my head. I want to keep doing, whatever it is were doing but how? How am I going to make it work?"_

_Yep. This was her life. The Man with a Plan was in need of one. One that involved her. She took pity on the fool. "Steve... Let's just start slow. How do you feel about me?"_

_He turned and his face warmed as he pull her into his side on the couch. He waited for her to get comfortable and he draped his arm over her shoulder. "You? About you I feel like, in all the decades I have lived in your the best thing of any of them." He looks down at her with nothing more than a familiar smile as if what he just said wasn't most wonderful thing a 90 something year old Super hero could say to a regular ole human._

_"Oooh Steve. That was beautiful." She snuggles deeper into his side. "Look at you! That wasn't even borderline cheesy Nicolas Sparks. I mean, I'm flattered even if technically you have in fact lived through a lot more decades than you're probably referring to... just mostly suspended in ice." Well she wasn't going to stop being Darcy just because her heart was melting, OKAY?_

_He laughs. "Well it's true. Even before we started all of this. You were... You were my friend. Probably my only friend. I needed that. To feel like myself."_

_She looks up and blinks. and blinks. and blinks._

_"So I, uh, would like to hear more about this 'beneficial friends' thing if you're up for it."_

_She blinks again. '_ Pull it together Darcy. You can go all Fangirl over the fact Captain Freaking America basically called you his best friend later. Never mind the fact that he is the most adorable Grandpa ever. "beneficial friends"? So adorable!No, not now. Make words, Darcy. Form wooords.'

_"Uh, yeah. I could be up for that." Eloquent Darcy, eloquent._

_"Yeah? Great. Alright then." Clearly the two of them were full grand articulation tonight. He nods_

_They meet eyes and smile. They both, honest to goodness, giggle and he pulls her back onto his lap once more._

_"Okay. If you want to keep this 'thing' between us. I can respect that. I get it." She did, actually. "Simple. I can be into that."_

_"You're amazing." He begins to draw slow kisses along her jawline and to that spot behind her ear she always turns into him as he does. He was now pressed close to her ear. "I expect a full layout of guidelines, Agent Lewis. I really do but for now, I am hoping to reap some of those benefits."_

_"Yes, Sir!" She salutes and they laugh into each other as the kiss starts to deepen._  

~*~

Jarvis had told him that she was on her way out of the building. Steve had assumed that meant walking out or at least NEAR the front door. When the elevator stopped at the floor with the labs, he stepped out and made his habitual glance over to Dr. Foster's lab. Darcy could usual be found there if she had any down time while tended to things in the tower. Steve always looked in to see if he could steal a glance.

Ironically enough, what he didn't plan on seeing was Darcy.

She stood both in the hall and in the doorway. With the window panels looking into the lab, Steve could see Darcy was being embraced by Dr. Foster. The astrophysicist's hand coming up to begin stroking Darcy's hair. At that, Darcy looked so unlike herself. Typically so impregnable to any dark clouds, now obliviously in need of the hug she was receiving.

He was the reason she needed a hug.

His chest became tight. He had to move. Get out before she knew he witnessed a brief moment of weakness. He began a quick jaunt to his originally intended destination.

Once the door of Tony's lab had close behind him, he put a hand out to the wall to brace himself as he caught his breath. It was the first time he had been like this since the serum. The tightness. It felt like the Asthma attacks he had suffered as a sick kid.

Tony began as he caught his breath. "Here I had hope it was just a spat but seeing how you look worst off than you were in here just a few a days ago, well worst off than I have ever seen you really, I am going to have to believe you guys went ahead and ended the whole thing. So who did it, You or The Kid?"

"She told you." It wasn't a question. Steve had just figured if he hadn't told him, that only left one other person.

"No. You just did. Confirmed it anyways." Tony shrugged and to his credit, he wasn't being his normally intolerable self about it.

"I did. Ended it, I mean. How did you figure it out?" Steve looked off behind the other man. Still by the door. He hadn't brought himself to fully enter the space.

"The pictures, for one." Tony puts up his hand, tilts his head down and faces out a palm. "Relax, I didn't tell her. You know, for what it's worth, I would have done the same thing to the guy if it was Pep and I was seeing everything in front of me. I didn't tell you that then but I was only just putting the pieces together. Jarvis helped with the rest." Tony whirls a finger pointed at the ceiling and pulls a stool underneath himself for a seat. "I must say. All those months and months, now so obviously together and you two never once tried to sneak off and do the deed in my Tower? I'm kinda disappointed. Missed out on a chance for a good story, my man." His arms crossed over his chest, focus firmly on Steve.

"Maybe we were just smart enough to erase any surveillance?" Steve smirks a 'I never kiss and tell but boy, if I did!' smirk. It was unguarded and the closest thing to a smile in four days.

"Atta' boy! Now THAT'S more like it!" Tony claps. "So why did you end it? The Kid too much woman for ya?" Steve's almost smile drops at the question. He has two choices. He can tell Tony where to take his 'Atta' boy' or he could open up. 

' _Time to finish thawing out, Cap._ ' He thinks but he doesn't really know if it is said in his voice or hers.

Steve says nothing. It's not in defiance. He just doesn't say anything.

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, well for this, but you do realize that Darcy is in the thick of it no matter what, right? In danger? A target?" Steve cuts him off.

"Thank you, Tony. For the reminder that no matter what I do, she's going to have a bulls-eye on her back. Did you ever think maybe Darcy had her reasons for wanting out too? She didn't exactly put up a fight." Steve stops. Going from confirming the relationship for the first time aloud and right into unloading his weighted chest in a three minute span was not going to happen. Tony picked up on it but still pried.

"What I can't understand is, that mission was months ago. If you were so concern for her safety then why not break things off then? Keep her safe? Get out clean, with all parties intact? No, I would wager that you were already in pretty deep by then. Couldn't let go even if you felt it was right thing to do. So you got selfish and kept her tucked away. So why now? Why do I have the both of you looking like sad puppies in my halls?"

Steve wasn't under the assumption that engineers were ever this perceptive.

"What does it matter to you? What's your stake in this, Stark?" His Captain America voice coming out without warning.

"A teammate. Mostly." Tony offers.

Steve looks at him square in the eyes.

Tony continues. "You are aware that you're not the only one that has ever had to come back and had to learn how to live all over again, right?" He almost sounds annoyed with Steve. "Hell, you're not even the only one in the room that has ever had to do that. And I can tell you, where you're standing, you could do a lot worse at living than spending your time tangled up in The Kid."

Steve's face softens then steels. It's not anger or recognition that causes him to do so. It's embarrassment combined with that all so wonderful "pop" sound one hears when they pull their head out of their very own ass and take a look at the world around him. Tony wasn't being Tony. Tony was being himself. His true self. Showing that he too had demons he continually conquered. Probably because he had Ms. Potts to help him along and now he was trying to help Steve.

"Yeah. I suppose you're right." Steve nods then smirks. "When did she ask you to talk to me?" Tony Stark willing giving a meaningful and personal pep talk about learning to live again, had Darcy written all over it.

Tony smirks back. He's been made. "Few weeks ago. It kinda got my wheels turning to finally check in on you two and see if you were in fact doing the horizontal mambo. As much as I would like to think The Kid thinks of us all with such consideration, I don't think it compares on the same level as she was fighting for you to rejoin the living "

Of course she was. Of course Darcy cared that much. That's what Darcy does. She cares. It sounds like she may even care for him the most. "To be honest. I don't even feel like I deserve her most the time." The admission out there. Steve's walls were beginning to crumble. "But I couldn't let her go either. Even after I realized I could never give her what I felt she deserved, I just kinda held on till I couldn't anymore."

"You don't deserve her, you know?." Tony shrugs "But do you really think there is a soul alive that feels I deserve Pepper?"

"God no!" Steve huffs.

"Okay Captain Currently Sleeping Alone. Let's not kill the moment." Tony reprimands and Steve looks apologetic. "What I am trying to say is, that's what makes us the lucky ones! What makes this entire way of life, or calling, or personal hell, or whatever it is worth it. Because somewhere in there, we are getting rewarded far better than we ever deserve."

Silence hangs but it says more than Steve could ever express in gratitude to what Stark, his friend, just did for him.

"Well then. That was far more male bonding I ever hope to do again in a lifetime. I'm going to go pour myself a very stiff drink and find Pep to remind myself just how lucky I am. I'll leave you to it, my good man." With that Tony passes Steve with a brief clasp on the shoulder. Steve nods and the man carries on his way.

How was he going to fix this?

_~*~_

_"YOU'RE INFURIATING, STARK! DOES THE TERM 'SEXUAL HARASSMENT MEAN ANYTHING, ANYTHING AT ALL TO YOU?! Forget it, I'm calling Pepper!" Darcy was well above her usual level of anger with the man she not so lovingly addressed as Perv on a daily basis._

_"Good, please do! I will have HER ask you! You know you wouldn't lie to Virginia Potts. Here allow me." Tony reached for Darcy's phone and both he and Darcy take notice of the Captain standing in the doorway, witnessing the exchange. "Oh, Hiya, Cap! Just the perfect man for the job. Come, stand here." Tony stands behind Steve and direct him to in stand in front of Darcy who was now wearing an impressive blush. "You see, Captain, The Kid here is sporting what the kids refer to as a 'Hickey'. I saw it, Plain as day. She now not only is bold face lying to me about having said 'Hickey', she refuses to tell me WHO is this grown man, or women... please, oh please, let it be a women... is walking around giving hickey like they are 13 and still playing spin the bottle in someone's parents romper room! Now, just look at her and ask." Tony peaks over Steve's shoulder and says "Darcy, please remember lying to Captain American is a Federal offence. annnd GO!"_

_"Stark, I am not asking Darcy about her private life." If Steve were able to sound like a Bulldog, he was sure he just had._

_"Darcy, who gave you the hickey? Please tell Stark immediately....and maybe take off your top so we can get a better look." Tony did an awful, truly just so, so, so bad Captain America voice behind Steve's back that if what he had said hadn't angered Steve so bad. Steve would have turned to rip into the perv before the voice came from the hall._

_"Anthony Stark! You get out in this hall right NOW!" A pissed Pepper was a terrifying Pepper. All three in the room froze with fear though knowing only Tony was the one who had anything to worry about._

_"Huh, Hey Pep. Baby? What's wrong?" Well that voice of Tony's sounded nothing like Captain America NOR himself._

_"Look at the phone in your hand. You dialed me. I heard everything and I need you to step into this hall this very instant or I am coming in there to get you and you don't want that." It was amazing how clear she sounded even through such gritted teeth. Tony nearly ran passed her and into the hall. Pepper returned her attention to Steve and Darcy, fresh faced and pleasant as ever. A transformation sure to make even the Hulk go, 'huh?'  "Agent Lewis, Captain, I am incredibly sorry for that. Please allow me to have a word with Mr. Stark and I will be right back in with you." They would have told her there was no need but seriously, would you have?_

_"Hey." She says. Still red in the face._

_"Hey yourself. So I'm gonna go ahead and guess you didn't tell Stark we slept together, huh?" It was his best attempt at deadpan._

_"Did you want me to?! I could call him back in here if you like." She's bluffing._

_"No, that is quite alright. Thank you. I'm uh, really sorry about the uh, hickey?" The term sounding weird coming from him._

_"It's okay, I figured 70 years of pent up sexual frustration, you just got caught up in the moment. Plus I fared far better than my now broken headboard, wouldn't you say? Just don't let it happen again." She always had a way of putting him at ease._

_"Again? You, uh, you would wan't to do it again?" What did he miss?_

_"Uh yeah! I mean I don't know if your were there but it was pretty fricken fantastic. I feel as if we would be doing the 'hook up Gods' and injustice by not doing it again. If you want, that is." Her ending sounding a little less confident than the beginning._

_"No! I definitely want to do it again!" Whoa Captain Eager._

_"Okay then." She smile and nods._

_'Okay." He concurs with his own nod_.

~*~

"He White Fanged you!" Jane said pointing with now cold fry.

"Jane? Are you drunk?!" Darcy had absolutely no idea what her friend was talking about. Lunch out turned out to be the first dive bar with bar food they walked past. Somewhere after an hour and a half Darcy sent an email to her boss and boss's boss, for good measure, saying there was a matter to tend to at the Tower and she would be spending the rest of the afternoon there. S.H.I.E.L.D did not need to know a post-day drinking catnap on the leather coach Tony kept in his workshop was what she was going to be considering "billable hours" for the rest of the day.

"No. I have not had _anything_ to drink. _YOU'RE_ awaiting your fourth Rum and Coke." Jane defended.

Fourth? Ugh, thank Odin she was of sound mind to write the email earlier. Four was a straight binge.

"I mean it though, I have been reviewing everything you told me. The first time, your birthday, his jealousy front. Darcy, I am pretty sure he White Fanged you!" Jane loved when she had facts to review. Anything she could solve by reviewing, really.

"JANE! Quit saying White Fanged like it's a thing! I have no idea what you're saying!" Even if Darcy wasn't feeling a little liquored up, this conversation was insane.

"You know. The book. He was trying to return you to the wild! He needed you to feel like you didn't belong to set you free! White Fanged!" Jane was positively glowing. 

"Say White Fanged, one more time Jane. Please." Ugh, having Thor around was turning Jane into some sort of romantic. Blah, It was super gross.

"Okay, fine but I mean it." Her face changes. "OH, Gaw! and then I go and set you up on that date. Geeze, it probably only wanted him to Whi.... let you go more. Darce, I am so sorry, I had no..." Darcy cuts Jane off, surprisingly not right after she almost said the other thing.

"No. You didn't do anything! First off, you had NO IDEA! Secondly, I said yes. It wasn't for any other reason that yeah, I wanted to go out on a date. I wanted someone to take me out of the confines of an apartment and show me off. I use to think Steve and I were headed that way but, then it stopped. My birthday happened and for whatever reason, it just stalled. We got into a routine and I didn't question it. I liked being around him so much that I never really felt like I needed to. Then you sprang a date on me and I thought, 'you know what? Yeah! I should go out. What's Steve going to mind? He's plenty capable of holding down his apartment on his own.' I honestly feel like he just used it as a way out anyways." Darcy's fourth is placed on the table as she finishes. "Well GOOD RIDDANCE, CAPTAIN DILLWEED!" Darcy toast into the air.

"So you're not going to talk to him?" Jane, Jane, Jane! What was Darcy going to do with her?!

"For what? To ask to be let back into another year of an undercover relationship-not-really-a-relationship thing? No way! I have way more pride than that. Sadly, he's right. I did the one thing I am afraid everyone thought I would do. I slept with one of them. I am an Avenger groupie. Well this groupie will not be servicing anymore Superheros, past or present from here on out!" Did her speech sound slurred to anyone else but herself? Could anyone else hear her?

"You're not a groupie! Be careful. That is my friend you're talking about." Jane puts a hand over Darcy's. "You felt something. You continued something for _months_ , Darcy. It's okay to say you had feelings, even if right now those particular feelings are feeling a bit trampled."

"All I feel is four drinks in two hours and half a basket of fries for lunch on a skipped breakfast. I think I am ready to go back and have a lay down. That is the extent of my feelings on this matter. Period." With that, Darcy signaled for the check and simultaneously closed the book on this conversation. 

~*~ 

Darcy woke to the sound of Tony setting a tall glass of water on the coffee table. When she opened her eyes it was sitting next to two Aspirins and a piece Chocolate cake. "Thank you!" She lightly shouts at him as she sits up slowly and reached for the water.

"You're welcome." He kept his back turned to her and immersed into his task. It was with the most nonchalance he asked "Do you love him?" His backed still turned.

Darcy was unfazed by the question. Tony seemed to know everything anyways. "Eh, what does that even mean? I mean right now I love you."

"Aww, thanks Kid." He says turning around.

"Oh, I was talking to the cake." Her words forming over the piece in her mouth and pointing to the rest with her fork.

Tony rolls his eyes and goes back to his materials. "Okay, Let me ask it this way. Are you in love with him?"

"Why?" Seriously, she thought. Why did it matter? 

He turns once more.

"Well it doesn't to me one way or the other, all though you do know how much I love to be ahead of the gossip curve but I, uh , just figured since no one knows and even though Dr. Foster is the woman with all the degrees, you Kid, could shut down any line of conversation with her you didn't want to be having. I am a little more stubborn in that aspect. You've become so much the team. To me, this year, please allow me to return the favor and just ask you a question like you are a normal human being and maybe help _you_ heal for once. Are you in love with him?"

Darcy actually pondered it. Love was never really on the table with them, how was she suppo.... ah, crap! She was in love with Captain Dickwad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? What happened on Darcy's birthday? What pictures? What did Steve do to the guy? Find out next time on the exciting ALMOST conclusion of Well That Was Fun...! Thanks for reading! I have been having so much fun with all if this. Comments greatly appreciated!
> 
> Also, credit where credit is due. "White Fanged." Was ripped from, i believe season 1, of New Girl. It's a reference of the Jack London book


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A story of a relationship, told out of order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me let you in a little conversation between Jane Foster & Myself
> 
> ["You felt something. You continued something for a year"]  
> Me: "Cut! Uh, Jane. I mapped out a for this all to take place over months. Lengthy period of months but definitely not a year. It kinda drags it out too far and I don't think our mutual friend Darcy, here, would really put up a non-relationship for a year. I don't care how fine the Captain is."  
> Jane: "No, it's totally cool. I have been in hundreds of these FanFics This is your first one, right? Trust me a year sound super dramatic. Go for the Gold, ya know?"  
> Me: "Yeah, I dunno... I would really like to go with my instincts on this one."  
> Jane: "Shhh. It's ok. It's gonna be great. You're doing great. Let me help the flow."  
> ~Cut to needing to write this chapter & I begin cursing that damn Jane.~  
> Jane! Why did you screw me so!! I really can't account for a whole year!  
> So I will make you, the reader, a deal...  
> Allow me this, since it is my very first Fanfic, I am going to go back annnd juuust change when Jane says a "year" to "months". I'm allowed one rookie patch up, right?  
> I promise, as Thank you, I will take this piece and get it a really through Beta that it so desperately needs, after the final chapter is out.  
> Deal?
> 
> Also, I don't really know the rating settings. I want to say without giving too much away. There is mild violence somewhere in here. It's brief but it is most certainly there.  
> Also. Darcy uses the F-word. Well, because she is Darcy.
> 
> And remember: italics = past
> 
> See end note for more

_Darcy Lewis had a slight snore. She will fight you on that until she's blue in the face but she does. Steve Rogers didn't care. He thought it was as endearing as it was adorable. Even if sometimes, when she rolled over too fast she snorted into her snore and Steve had to suppress a laugh. He was in deep for Darcy Lewis._

_Daylight was just beginning to break. Barely a hint of light began to seep pass the drawn curtains. He was watching her sleep. Honest to goodness, watching her sleep. Mesmerized. Bewitched. Enchanted. How did he get here? They had been decidedly **not** dating for months now._

_He wanted more._

_As unsure as he was about taking things out among the living, he knew Darcy would be there with him. He could rely on her to help him navigate the uncharted waters. Help him thaw. He needed to find the right moment. Do things right by her and properly ask her to be his girl._

_"Steve Rogers, you are such a creeper." Ever the morning person, Darcy began to stir._

_"Sorry, I was just watching you sleep." Then as if he was outside of his body and still watching the scene in disbelief, he actually took two fingers swept her hair from in front of her eyes. Oh she was going to hate that. Steve grinned despite himself._

_As expected "Ugh, you are the worst." She turned her head to face the other way to attempt to drift back off. Steve gave a hearty laugh and went to get out of bed._  
_"Wait! Where are you going?" She whips to face him. Head still on the pillow. Her arm on the bed and reached out for him._

_"I was going to get ready for a run." He points with a thumb over his shoulder just as she begins to make grabby hand gesture with the hand now raised off the bed. He attempts a "Captain America is disappointed with what you're going to try and get away with" look but he climbs back into his spot anyways. Sitting slightly. She moves to drape herself over his midsection. "How often are you going to pull this? I've got to keep in shape. No one is going to want a soft Captain. Not very frighting to evil-doers if I showed up with a dunlap."_

_"Can you get soft?" She asked it in earnest. The serum left a lot of questions for everyone. Himself included._

_"I don't know really but do we want to find out?" He begins running a soft hand over her back._

_"I would still want you. If you went soft. Might even make you an even better pillow." She nuzzled into to him futher. He knew her eyes were closing and her breathing began to slow and even._

_He humphs out a puff of air, pulling his lip in a half smile and began in on smoothing her hair with his fingers. "You would, wouldn't you?" He muses quietly, knowing she was already back asleep._

_Making her his girl was going to be the smartest thing he ever did._

_The electrifying buzz of excitement pulsing through him was short lived and brutally interrupted by his cell going off. He knew the tone. Duty calls._

_Darcy shoots awake and ready for a fight. "For the love of everything Holy! Can't a girl sleep?!" She twist back into the sheets and faces the other direction yet again. Nope, not even a situation worthy of an early side of Dawn call to the World's First Superhero was going to make mornings anymore bearable for Darcy._

_Steve was already rushing about readying himself to leave for the mission, when Darcy's own phone went off. "SHIT! Shit, shit, shit!" She begins clawing her way out of bed and scrambling for her phone. She looks so frazzled he almost felt guilty for finding it kinda sexy. Knowing her own phone was chirping because she too was at least a little important to the fate of the free World. "Agent Lewis. Yes Sir. Understand Sir. I will be right in, Sir." She hangs it up swiftly and shoots to her feet collecting yesterday's clothes from around the floor, he supposes she finds it quicker than locating her bag full of fresh clothes out near the front door._

_"Good Morning?" He dares._

_"Yeah, hey. Gotta go!" She runs past him towards the bathroom then turns to look at him "Don't think this is over, Cap! You owe me a morning pillow!... Maybe even a little nookie!" She calls out, voice trailing down the hall._

_He shakes his head, laughing. He walks out of the room and calmly to the spot where his keys lay on the entryway table by the door. He removes his house key and walks back over to the bathroom. The flushing sound of the toilet is fading and he hears the water run as she begins to wash her hands. He knocks._

_"Come in!" Darcy is putting tooth paste on her brush and before she she brings it to her lips she shouts "WHAT ARE YOU EVEN STILL DOING HERE?!"_

_He holds up his phone, not that she can even read the official text without her glasses that still lay on the bedside table. " 'Tash is coming in a helicopter." He half shrugs before she can question. "They throw a ladder down. It's a whole thing."_

_She pauses a second as if in disbelieve then continues on with her brushing. He joins her at the sink. Applies paste to his own brush. Eyeing each other in the mirror. They're norm will never be a normal couple's norm._

_Around a mouthful of spit says "Will you stay here?"_

_Darcy leans to spit, runs a bit of water. "What?! Did you not hear my phone? I am not exactly running with my head cut off for sport..." she continues brushing. She is giving him a look in the mirror as if the pre-mission adrenaline is getting to his head._

_He mimics her bend, spit and water rinse. "No, sorry. I mean while I am on mission. I was wonder if you would stay here. My place has that crazy Stark Security system and all." His brush back in his mouth one more time._

_Bend, spit, water rinse. "And you think mine doesn't? You think Tony is going to let his favorite coffee fetcher go without state of the art burglar protection?" She continues brushing._

_He brushes a bit more as he gives her a look. They both know she means more to Tony than the only one who was willing to sit through the lengthy tutorial of how to properly use his amped up machine. She just shrugs and he bends to give his mouth a final rinse. Banging the brush against of the sink and placing it into the medicine cabiant. She follows suit. Both now standing at the sink, facing each other. He runs a hand over her arm, she peers up at him through her lashes._

_"Okay. Total honesty. It will give me a peace of mind. Something about you being here while I am away... I don't know. I just need it." His honesty raw._

_Sounds of the helicopter begin in the distance and increasing in volume rapidly. She doesn't have time to protest. Steve isn't sure if she would or not but the inability to certainly seems as if it's going to work for him._

_"Dirty fightin'. Waiting right before your grand exit?" Her eyebrows raised. He holds out the key and she takes it in her hand before looping her arms around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss. "Be safe saving the world, Cap." The kiss is brief but still deep with unspoken emotions before he hops to it and gets out the front door._

_~*~_

_"Jane! Are you watching?! This move could save your life one day, Jane! Watch!" Steve could hear Darcy before he even went to look for her. He found her in front of Dr. Fosters' workspace with Clint. Both in their tactical training gear which was fitting because the parts of Darcy's schedule he had memorized, she and Clint were suppose to be in one of the Tower's gyms working on Darcy's hand-to-hand competency. Yet here they stood. Darcy trying to get the clearly distracted woman to pay attention as if it were a child asking the same of a parent. Steve stays at the door._

_"Darce. It's getting late I gotta...." Clint looks at the large digital clock on the wall and when his gaze is up, Darcy pounces._

_"Oh yeah? Hi-ya! Woo! Pow! Hi-ya!" Darcy wildly narrates her actions and the finished project leaves her standing behind Clint. One of his arms twisted tightly up into his back and held in place by Darcy who also has a firm thigh between the special Agent's legs, keeping them apart._

_"NICE, Lewis! Though, I have to say the sound effects did nothing to add to a level of stealthiness." Clint chides and Darcy keeps hold._

_"Yeah? Well what if my objective wasn't only to subdue you but also to throw you of kilter enough to determine iiiiiifffff.... YOU'RE TICKLISH!" Darcy takes her free hands and works her fingers into Clint's sides. Jane has yet to look up for any of this despite the hilarity of the usually in control special Agent attempting to dodge the smaller women's hands in a frantic escape from a tickle monster._

_"Whoa!" a laugh. "Hey!" A laugh. "Come on now!" A louder laugh. Each words said as Clint moved to block an incoming tickle. "You know what? That's it!" With a finesse that years of his line of work would bring, Clint swiftly moves both he and Darcy so he is now standing behind . Both of Darcy wrist pressed together and held above her head by one of Clint's hand and his other splayed against her abdomen. It all occurs as quickly as the threat came out. Dr. Foster has still yet to take notice of any of this._

_Steve has. Steve has taken noticed of Agent Barton holding his soon to be girl like a cellist would hold his instrument. Steve has noticed Clint lean into Darcy's ear and Steve can definitely hear Clint say; "I am going to give you one chance to beg for mercy..."_

_"Never!" Shouts Darcy as she make a feeble attempt to break the hold just as Clint starts in on her. Darcy goes breathless with laughter. She attempts to bend and twist. Steve goes in to put a stop to it all when Darcy manages words. "Uncle! Uncle!" She calls out._

_"Wouldn't it be more like 'Daddy' at this point? Like 'who's your Daddy?" Clint laughs._

_Yeah, Steve definitely noticed that one._

_Steve enters the room and sternly clears his throat. Eyes fixed on the tangled pair._

_"Oh hey, Steve!" Darcy calls out behind laughter that quickly fades when she finds no humor on his face. "Uh? Captain?" She pulls a questioning face. "You uh, missed me handing Barton here his behind."_

_"No, I saw." It's all he offers._

_"Well alright then. I'll be on my way." Clint picks up a gym towel Steve assumes he brought in with him and uses it to bop Darcy on the nose. "Alright Lewis. Same time next week. I'll teach you how to get out of that hold I just used." He loops the towel around the back of his neck and down his shoulders and makes his way pass where Steve stood. He smirks and greets him with an almost knowing "Captain."_

_Steve responds with curt nod and a tight lined jaw. "Barton."_

_The two men cross paths and Steve carries on towards Darcy and Dr. Foster who has yet to look up even still. He eyes her, trying to determine how informal he can be with Darcy without her noticing. This sneaking around stuff was getting really old. "I uh, was just coming from Dr. Banner's lab and I..."_

_Jane finally shoots a head up and cuts Steve off. "Dr. Banner is back?" She picks up the very paper she is working on and set of out of the lab. Like that, she is part of the conversation and gone from it in one swift swoop._

_Steve turns his attention back to Darcy who seems less than please with either the sudden privacy or Steve. "Dr. Banner really here or did you need an excuse for why you were getting all jealous eavesdropping in the halls?" Steve. She was less than pleased with Steve._

_"I don't know." He shrugs. "I never made it pass the elevators and I wasn't eavesdropping. Nice form, by the way." Deflection at it's finest._

_Darcy's look goes even more unamused as she says "Nice subject change." She says crossing her arms._

_"I wasn't!" Her looks deepens. "Eavesdropping." He says. "I can't account for the other accusation." His face starts turn a warm shade of red just as her's begins to soften._

_"Aww, Captain doesn't want anyone else playing with his toys." She says as she takes the two remaining steps to him and puts her arms out for a hug which he willing steps into. At least with Darcy being so open to touch, it made contact in the Tower to be easily written off as 'Darcy being Darcy'. He was enjoying her primal post sweat smell too much to make mention how he didn't like that she cheapened herself to one of his toys._

_"I am glad I ran into you though." He says pulling apart to look at her and run a hand down her arm. "So why did it take a rather huge, Blonde bird to tell me your birthday isn't only coming up... IT'S TOMORROW?!"_

_"Thor's ass is grass!" She pounds the outer edge of a fist onto a flat palm of her other hand. She is staring off in the distance, obviously planning the God's demise when connecting with Steve's forced eye contact brings her back.  "Look, it's not a big deal. I am not a big birthday person. I am probably going to head out and do numerous tequila shots with Jane and the now recently deceased to me; Thor. Again, not a big deal." She does a clearing swipe motion with her hands as if to clear the conversation from the space, like they never even had it._

_"That's too bad because I, uh was kinda hoping I could, ya know. Take you out for it." That trusty nervous tick of the hand to the back of his neck begins. Darcy's automatic response kicks in and she moves to lower it for him._

_"Yeah? Like out in the Real World where other people can see us? Out- out?" She looks more intrigued._

_"Yes. Out. Like out on the town. Out." He tries to gather any courage he can muster._

_"Well THAT is worth celebrating! If even only to see you're take on a night out, you're on!" She has never looked so childlike and playful to him. Her excitement is contagious. He goes to gather her for a hug once more. If his phone hadn't chimed in he may have gotten so caught up that he would have kissed her right there._

_She lays her forehead on his chest "Duty calls." She says disappointed. Then looks up at him._

_"Yeah. Duty calls." He is running both hands over her arms. Then looking down at her. Noticing all the glow gone from her face. "You okay?"_

_"Yeah. Totally. Like I said 'Not a birthday person'. It just would have been kinda cool, ya know, going out and all. But hey the world needs you... the guy that I am sleeping with... on my birthday. For the record I was very much okay with my original plan not more than two minutes ago!" He can't tell if she's mad. Mad at him, the call or Thor, honestly._

_"Hey. Hey, come here." He is buying time but he's going to give her a hug regardless. "I will do everything I can to be back in time for tomorrow. I promise."_

_She nods. She is putting on a good air of indifference._

_"You're gonna stay at my place, right?"_

_"Yeah. I'll be there." She says with a deflated sigh._

_He knows he shouldn't but all of her excitement has seemed to just drain out of her. He wants to see her light up again. Waiting till tomorrow to take this thing out into the open is just too far away. He bends into her and gives her his best, knock you socks of, kiss your best fella off to war, let's hear it for the cheap seats, kiss he has in him. He pulls away and her gaze dizzy and dazed. If she were capable of words he's pretty sure all would have been able to summon would be a simple "wow'. It leaves him satisfied as a suitable place holder till he returns. He runs a hand over her cheek and turns towards the door. She follows to watch his departure._

_"This is a perfect opportunity for your birthday gift! I'll make sure it gets to you!" He calls out as he continues down into hall._

_"I thought you just found out it was my birthday?!"_

_"I did. Bought this weeks ago just because!"_

_... and out the door to the fire stairs he goes..._

_It's later on that Darcy is greeted at her desk._

_"Agent Lewis." The nameless intern says. "This is to be delivered to you personally." He holds out a dark velvet drawstring pouch._

_"Thank you." She says reaching for the bag and politely dismissing the young man. How much does he know? Where did Steve have this to where the baby-faced intern could get to it?_

_All question leave the space as removes the small box from it's velvet bag and it is a very recognizable Tiffany's blue. An audible gulp. She unties the white ribbon and there, connected to a key, she assumes to be Steve's apartment, is a solid silver pendant hanging from the key chain, She brings it up for further inspection. The pendant is in the shape of a Tazer._

_"Very funny, Captain." She says aloud. she tries to remain unaffected as the huge smile over takes her face._

_~*~_

_The fellow that was the target of their mission wasn't Hydra but no one had told the guy that. S.H.I.E..L.D was able to track down the head of small but forceful Hydra sympathizer terrorist cell. There was very good intel that the group had been collecting information on low level S.H.I.E.L.D employees. It was unknown what he had planned for the knowledge._

_For a group that had originally seemed so small in size, it had surprisingly taken the half of the Avengers assigned the mission a whole day to tackle the leader's henchmen before they could get close to the group's main nerve center. For a nobody group, they were organized and determined. Steve saw right away the need for his team and not a S.H.I.E.L.D. STRIKE team. These guys could have been deadly._

_It was Steve who entered the room first. He apprehended the cell's Mastermind. Chills ran down his back as soon as he got near him. The man reminded Steve of Zola right away. He hated him instantly and what he saw next only justified his gut judgment._

_Darcy. He saw Darcy. Everywhere. Black and white surveillance photos hung everywhere. Darcy outside of the Tower. Darcy entering S.H.I.E.L.D. NY offices. A picture of her shopping at a Goddamn Farmer's Market. Then... there was a picture of her walking down the stoop of Steve's apartment. They knew. There was not a picture of a single other Agent. Just Darcy. They were targeting her because they knew. Steve saw red._

_By this time Tony had made it into the dark, damp room, Steve's anger was building. The waves of tension coming off him were almost tangible. Steve dragged the man, whose feet no longer stood on the ground, over to a whiteboard where a cluster of photos hung._

_"What are you doing with these?! Why are you following her?!" An arm pulled far back and Steve delivered a forceful, blunt fist to the man's face. Pulled back and delivered another. "What were you going to do with her?!" Another fist to the face. Another. Another. Steve was not holding back anything. Blood from the man's nose everywhere. He pulled back for another when Tony called out._

_"Cap!" Tony doesn't have anything for or against the action. He just says it._

_Steve drops his arm. The man that he still holds by the collar is badly swollen and battered. Steve's chest heaving. So much was felt in such a small amount of time. It was all so beautifully tragic. It was her birthday. She was tucked soundly in his apartment not knowing any of this was going on while he stood here with a bloody man in his hand. Bloodied by his action. Bloodied because he was a threat to the women he loved._

_He loved Darcy Lewis._

_Because of who he was, she had gotten in the wrong cross-hairs. Why? Was it always going to be this way?_

_He knew it was._

_Steve looked down at the man. He had the gull to smile back at him with anything still functioning in his face. "Hail HYDRA."_

_Steve has since given the accounts of what happens next in debrief after debrief and even in front of a very hush-hush disciplinary committee. Each time he remains he was not of sound mind as he lifted the man and tossed him into the wall across the small room. He knew right away the man had died. It was the way he went limp as he fell to the ground. Obviously broke his neck on impact. Neither he or Tony said a word. Barely moved outside of Steve's heavy breathing._

_Clint rounded the corner and stood in the doorway near where the man landed. With trained precision Clint took in the room within seconds. The pictures, Steve, the dead man at his feet. Processed, analysed and accepted as quickly as he took it in. He looks at Steve and gives a nod._

_"Yes, Sir. Suspect contained." Clint speaks into his com. Steve is unable to hear Fury. His own ear piece must have come out at some point. "Dead certain, Sir."_

_The room returns to silence._

_Steve moves first. "Darcy hears of none of this. Understood?" He motions around to the photos and then to the man laying on the ground. He looks at each man and awaits recognition from both before carrying on out the door. Stepping over the body as he goes._

_~*~_

_It was well past midnight and into the early morning when Steve was able to make it to his door. He had missed her birthday._

_The keys in the door, the tough stick from an old apartment, must have awaken her. She stood hopping from foot to foot trying to avoid the cold wood floors. She was wearing one of his shirts. More beautiful than ever because she was here. Safe._

_He loved her._

_"You're home!" She says horsed and hushed._

_"I am. I came home to you." He goes to her. He takes her face in both hands and gently kisses her. His eyes searching. She was here. She was safe. He wraps his arms around her and breathes her in. She puts her arm around his neck. "I'm home."_

_He kisses her deep and slow. The intensity increases. She was here. She was safe. His hands go from her back and slide down to her rear. He dips and moves his hands to her thighs and lifts her. He lifts her high enough where she can wrap her legs around his waist. He holds her in place with one hand back on her behind. The other flat on her back. Bringing her closer. He pulls her in and kisses her again. "Let's go to bed." He carries her towards the room._

_He spent the time before sunrise, affirming himself that she was here, safe through steady and slow lovemaking. She was out of direct harm's way, he had taken care of that. It didn't stop from frequent wakings, after they had managed to drift off, to grab a hold of her to remind himself that it was over._

_For now. It was over for now._

_It was only a matter of time before she became a target again. He wouldn't be able to kill them all._

_~*~_

_To have Darcy completely in the dark of the mission just hours prior was surreal to say the least._

_True to form she had picked up on his mood right away and responded accordingly without prompt. She snuggled a little closer and held on a little tighter. She didn't pry about what he had encountered. What he had done. She was just a quiet constant._

_He didn't deserve her._

_Around mid-morning she had decided he had sulked enough and they were going to brave a new front. They were going to Brunch._

_Steve was reluctant to leave the apartment but once it came to light that Steve had never actually 'done brunch', Darcy's giddy and childlike excitement she had in the lab came back. Before he knew it, Darcy was pushing him down the street and aimlessly chatting to no one... well maybe Steve, There was a lot of excited talking._

_"I know it doesn't seem like I would be into brunch but I totally am! Uh, I mean, Hello?! Breakfast food without having to wake up super early?! AND alcohol?! Oh Odin, I haven't had a mimosa in so long! Have you ever had one?" She looks at Steve and he realizes he's been asked a question. He searches. What did she ask him? There was a lot in there._

_"uh..." Steve is lost. The juxtaposition of paradigms is heavy._

_"It's okay. You're going to love 'em! Oh and papers! We need newspapers! THE CROSSWORD, Steve! The SUNDAY CROSSWORD!" Wildly animated is an understatement. He smiles despite himself. If there was an effective distraction from Darcy in danger, in was Darcy in a frenzy. "I am going to pop into this Bodega and get us some essential reading, you go ahead get us a table." She gestures to the restaurant next door with her chin. She was so into her own world she didn't even help him remove his hand from his neck. Maybe this was a bad idea. Before he could protest she is shooing him. "Go!"_

_After giving his name to the hostess he is waiting on the curb, trying to will Darcy to emerge from the Bodega. Preferably unharmed. He is greeted with a voice behind him._

_"Captain Rogers! Hey!" He turns to see a petite Blonde. He recognizes her from S.H.I.E.L.D. but it doesn't connect right away. Summers? Sanders? Sommers!_

_"Agent Sommers." He greets back rather formally for an out of office encounter. Random or not._

_"What brings you to these parts? Are you here alone? Would be ashamed to let you have brunch all by your lonesome." He may be ninety something but he was hip to the sickeningly sweet subtext to all that._

_"Ah, Cindy. Are you here to meet us too? Is Barton already in there?" Darcy comes from behind Steve and stands at his side. She is peering behind Agent Sommer into the restaurant's store front as if she were looking for someone. Steve looks at Darcy like she has began with the Mimosas without him._

_"Oh? No." Cindy was shaking her. "I was just finishing up. Keeping the Captain company till... you... arrived." Paired with the 'bless her heart' smile, it was pretty sure it was the verbal equivalent of a cat extending her claws._

_"Well, here I am. I'll be sure to let Clint know you say hello." Darcy says such simple words but they were so sharp... annnd Steve was scared. Incredibly confused and scared._

_"Yeah. Alright. Darcy, Captain Rogers. Have a good... whatever." Steve was clear on the dismissive tone with those words._

_"Agent Sommers." Steve has no idea what was going on but manner are always paramount._

_The Agent briskly walks pass Darcy and Darcy offers nothing to Steve. It was like nothing happened. What the hell happened?!_

_"oooh! Our table is ready!" Darcy claps and hustles to the awaiting hostess._

_They are seated. Drink orders taken... rather forced upon the young lady seating them rather than their waitress and Steven excepts an explanations from Darcy._

_She is eyeing over the menu. Making 'hmm' sounds._

_Nothing._

_"Are you going to tell me what that was?" Steve finally breaks._

_"What was?" Darcy drops the menu and looks around. "What happen?"_

_"Agent Sommers. Is Clint meeting us and I am unaware? What was the pissing contest I was so fortunate to be privy to? That. That all happened!" It has been the oddest of 48 hours._

_"Oh. Cindy hates Clint. I knew she would hightail it out." Darcy goes back to her menu as if that offered any explanation._

_"Okay?... and?" Really Darcy?_

_"Cindy slept with Clint. She hates him and I knew she wouldn't press any further, or more so, she wouldn't stick around to do so. We could have brunch in peace and not have Cindy-Fucking-Lou-Who see us having brunch, alone, together and this time tomorrow every Agent down to the mail-room clerks at work  know my business OR rather assume my business and next thing you know I am sleeping with Captain America." She folds her menu._

_"You are sleeping with Captain America?..." Seriously, is anyone else hearing this?_

_"No. I am sleeping with Steve Rogers. Maaaaaybe Captain Rogers. There is a difference. I mean Captain America is practically America's mascot, I would be the Harlot who wiggled her way into his lap. I thoroughly enjoy my time with Steve Rogers. He's a great guy. But all that? All this? Would make for some pretty boring water cooler talk." She picks her menu back up to button the conversation._

_"You know who she's slept with. How is that different?" Steve was maybe starting to string the thoughts along. Maybe._

_Menu down again. "It just is. Clint told me. It wasn't gossip. I haven't even told anyone. Well besides you. and Jane. and well Natasha. But NOT Tony!... He already knew! Okay, so maybe it turned into gossip but that only proves my point further."_

_The Mimosa arrive and they place their order. It's enough food for an Army but Steve only hopes it's enough for a super Solider and Darcy the eggs Benedict aficionado. Darcy takes a long sip, almost gulp of her Champagne and Orange Juice._

_"Mmm. That's the stuff!" She takes another._

_"What was your point, Darcy?!" Darcy head whips up. She gives a 'what's your problem?' look._

_"About Cindy? That I don't need people going around talking about me and lessening me to some Superhero-Spandex-Chaser. It would only add to the common notion that I am not an Agent on own strength. I am tired of having that fight." She shrugs. "I am going to do myself a favor and not add any fumes to the fire. I enjoy spending time with Steve Rogers but being Captain America's Girlfriend? No thank you!"_

_Well there was that._

_The rest of the meal that follows is considerably less exciting as Darcy original mood had promised. He is sure she notices but says nothing._

_He should be happy. It has all been made so easy for him._

_He knows this is actually a blessing. He'll have an out. She doesn't want to be his girl and that we'll ensure her safety._

_Congratulation, Cap._

_Now it was just a matter of finding the right time._

_Probably best to get it over with._

_"Soo?" Darcy sounds like she is ready to turn the vibe around. "Where can I expect this rain-checked birthday celebration to take place?"_

_He loves her though._

_"Honestly, I am still really wiped from the mission. How about we swing by your place for some stuff and you spend a couple nights at my place, huh?" He hates himself for wanting, no needing, to drag it out further but he's not ready yet._

_"Oh? Umm, yeah. That's cool too. Okay." She is bummed. That is obvious._

_"Yeah? Okay?"_

_"Okay." She says._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're thinking, "well Cap. You certainly accepted that quickly?!"  
> I agree.  
> however, with my next chapter outline I really felt we would be beating a dead horse to go into how it made him feel over and over again. Little too angsty for me. It was hard to write a whole chapter in his voice and not lighten it up with some awesome Darcy. So I thought, eh, Let's put a pin in it and revisit later.
> 
> Comments are always welcome!! Thanks for reading. This has been a lot of fun!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A story of a relationship, told out of order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well it's here!  
> I got a little sidetracked. I wanted to start a little Darcy and Bucky piece so I started devouring all I could to get a better feel for Bucky but I was simultaneously listening to a lot of Hozier and my original idea was getting angsty when I was shooting for lighthearted.
> 
> I want to do a more buddy romance thing next and feel like I can give Darcy a stronger narrative. *fingers crossed *
> 
> If anyone is reading this and is feeling charitable, I would love a triangle between Steve, Darcy and Clint. Not a OT3. A love triangle. I can't write one. I have no idea who I would choose!

"Hello? Steve. Hello?....." Darcy sighs "Steve, this is your second call in twenty four hours. You can't play it off as a butt dial now. Either speak up or at least Google how to block a number."

Steve held the line until it went dead. He knew calling her was no way to go about setting things right, however he was currently on a makeshift Military base in some tiny war-torn country somewhere in the world and waiting until he got back seemed like an eternity.

Only thing was he couldn't find the words. Honestly, he was kinda shocked when she had picked up.

"Still got your tail between your legs, huh?" Clint comes into the canvas covering and pulls up some earth to grab a seat.

"Did Stark tell everyone?" Steve shakes his head. Well at least the hurdle of getting it out in the open was over.

"No. Not everyone." Well that at least gives Steve some relief. "Thor found out from Jane. Which..." Clint looks around outside the sun covering. "I'd maybe steer clear till you get this sorted out." There went the loosening in his chest. It was right back to a tight knot.

"Well since it's probably my next Smithsonian exhibit 'The Great Fuck Up.'" Steve swipes on hand through the air as if imagining it on a marque somewhere. "With everyone being so privy to it, No. I can't even get to the point of having my tail between my legs. I've called her twice since we've..."

"You called her?! Oh man. Did they not have women in 'your time'?" Steve was letting Clint laugh only because he saw it as fit punishment. When it neared the full minute mark, he cleared his throat. "I'm sorry. It's just.." Clint gathering himself and clearing tears from his eyes. "Woo. Sorry. Okay. It's just you got Darcy. Darcy. The most emotionally competent woman in the world. You got her in your corner and not only do kick her to the curb with some bullshit, you try and make nice by CALLING HER? Yeah. You fucked up, alright. A few times."

"It wasn't bullshit." Steve offers and Clint shrugs.

"Hey, whatever you gotta tell yourself, man. I just hope for your sake and her's, you realize this isn't going to be fixed with some sappy words and make up sex. Wait. The sex was good, wasn't it? I'd bet good money she..."

Steve cuts him off with dryly asking "What do you suggest I do?" Not entirely sure he even wants the advice.

"Man the fuck up!"

"Excuse me?" Steve was staring to feel as if he should remind Hawkeye who the Captain was.

"Come on. Seriously? You lost her because you were too afraid to hold on to her. Being too afraid to man up to fix it and make bold declarations is only going to prove you never deserved her in the first place. How about you, uh, I don't know, TALK to her?! I am definitely calling my ex-wife when we get home."

"What? Sudden urge to fix things?" Steve didn't realize this was going to be therapy hour.

"No. Hell no. She just always said I would never find anyone more emotionally stunted than myself. I love any chance to tell her she is wrong." Clint picks up his bow and leaves before Steve can get angry.

Bold declarations. Alright. He could figure that out.

~*~

Darcy nearly had to club Jane over the head to get her to stopping asking for her to attend the Gala with her and Thor. She loved them but nobody loved being third wheel. Ever. Worse still, being a pitied third wheel. Jane had become relentless once Darcy ever-so-nicely let down Jane's arranged date for her but still planned on attending. Last Darcy had heard, Captain America was still on mission with Hawkeye anyways. There was no need for security detail. She would make her obligatory rounds, make sure Tony saw her with drink in hand and smiling broadly and then she would be on her way home to continue the evening Ben, Jerry and Netflix... but totally NOT in a 'woe is me' sorta way but more a 'I do what I want! Girl power!' way because she was going to get over this "thing" and move on. So what if she realized she maybe fell in love with him along the way?  Love was a scared asshole that ran for the hills. 

At least she knew she looked like a million bucks. Maybe even a billion. Signature Cateyed liner and Red lips aside, Darcy loved her dress. Long, black, fitted and flattering to the gals in a strapless sweetheart neckline. She had her soft waves pulled into a low, gathered bun at the back of her neck. Whimsical wisps of hair escaping from the front of the updo that framed her face and very large Black Onyx drop earnings. Yep. She was banging. She only wished she had known to gather ever ounce of confidence the ensemble gave her and hold it near. She wished that she had know she was going to need it.

Not even minutes after entering the room, the crowed parted and there stood Steve. Holy Fourth of July Fireworks did he look good! Real good. In a real tux and everything. Not even a stuffy rented one with a bow tie and cummerbund. Nope. It had a long black tie and was expertly tailored. Pepper was written all over that tuxedo. She knew it. She wondered why she had never gotten to see him in it before. Then she remembered they would of had to leave the apartment to see him in something like that. She wanted to throw something at him. She wanted to go up and embrace him. She wanted a little bit of space to figure out what she wanted, okay? Yet, she just stood still. Looking at him. She maybe spent a little more time than she should have admiring him because he turn to look out into the crowd as if he knew someone was watching him. Darcy did one of those 'about face' turn abouts where you grab a glass of champagne from a passing waiter and hurried along. She had always wanted to do that! Little mental fist bump and she able to successfully hide herself in the crowd. She could do this. Still makes her 'Hellos' and slip out undetected. No problem. She just needed more champagne.

The fault in her plan was the glasses of bubbly began to dull her senses. She stood talking to Senator 'please call me Richard' Huffman, a very important support for the Avenger's initiative in Congress, and his wife Dottie, when she lost Cap out of the constant view she kept on him out of her peripheral.

"Senator Huffman. Ma'am." Captain Rogers, not Steve, greets both of the Huffman as he rests a hand on Darcy's lower back. As pleasantries are exchanged, she slips a hand behind her back and makes a move to subtly move his. Their hands tangle as she tries to keep a sickeningly sweet show smile on for the Senator. More tangling ensues and she realizes he is thumb wrestling with her. Full on, 'one-two-three-four. I declare a thumb war' with her. She takes the first look at his face since he joined the circle and she can see he is suppressing a smirk. What a jerk.

"I thought you on a mission, Son? I d

idn't even think we were going to see you tonight." Senator Huffman presses.

"Fresh back, Sir. That is actually why I made my way over to you all. I hope you all won't begrudge a newly returned solider a chance to dance with the prettiest dame in the room, would you?" Ick. She was almost certain he was going to ask them to by War Bonds next. He is motioning to Darcy, who is giving him her politest 'do not make an ass of yourself OR me in front of the very important elected political official' smile but nowhere in there is a fawning, 'oh really Cap? A dance?' gaze.

"Well isn't that precious!" Dottie say putting a hand to her pearls. Not cool, Dottie. Not cool. Way to betray the sisterhood!

"Of course not, Son. Though I am afraid Mrs. Huffman is spoken for. Ms. Lewis here makes a fine substitute." They all give their best Washington chuckles. Wait? Did he just call her uglier than that old bag?

Since no one thought to ask Darcy where the Captain could shove his dance, she was being lead out onto the dance floor.

He was wearing his cuff links made to look like his shield. Darcy had gotten them for him after he confided how nervous most public appearances made him. The remembrance of how vulnerable he was when he admitted it out loud made her soften toward his touch a bit. As soon as she had it was apparent their bodies hadn't seem to notice the time away. They molded and fit together even in the modest dance hold. His scent filling her space.

She was in need of a shield of her own.

She glance back to the couple they just left and since they were still ogling them like adoptable puppies. It came back to her. She was out here on the dance floor, because like everything else, Steve got to call the shots. Chose whether he got to draw her close. Chose whether he got to push her away. That did it. Her barrier rectified. 

"What do you think your doing?" She hissed in a hushed tone.

"Dancing." Steve's voice coming from the Captain.

"Very funny. What are you even doing here? When did you get back?"

"Few hours ago. I am in borrow time until I am physically dragged into the debrief I skipped out on." A silence fell over them. "I went by your apartment." Steve coming through a little more.

Darcy shrugged. It must have been when she ran out to get appropriate cut of Spanx but she thought it best not to mention it and lose the allure of the dress.

They continued on in silence. Obviously taking each other in. Despite her well placed wall.

"Look. Darcy... I want to talk about it. I want to..."

"No need, Cap." She cut him off before her could make a play for the upper hand. "I mean, I didn't really get it, still don't. It's probably because I know there is very much something you're not telling me. Whether you can't or won't tell me, I don't know. I may never get that closure but ya know what? That sometimes happens in real relationships too. Since this wasn't that, a real relationship, I only expect moving on and one day feeling like it never happened that much more obtainable. So please, don't do me any favors by making some show of being this stand-up guy. That this was something it wasn't. Please, let's just call it a draw. " She roughly practiced something like this in front of her mirror, though she was finding it difficult to preform with the increasing amount of eyes on them from the old folks on the dance floor.

"Darcy." He hangs his head in a defeated slump. " Darcy, I am in love with you." Well that was not in her practiced dialogue. The anger is instantaneous though her composure remains calm. Could there be a more public place for this? Seriously? Anywhere? Forget the fact his statement contradicted the very reason they were having the conversation.   

"Well I am in love with you too but you don't see me kicking you out the door and slamming it behind you, do you?!" It was so hard to be huffy and contained at the same time.

"You love me?!" Steve stopped his dance and looked down at her.

"Yeah." She said shooting up a look at him. It was sharp and sounded like the verbal equivalent of jamming one of her stiletto heels into his big toe.

"Okay then." He nods and picks the dance back up. Maybe he was just as confused by the roundabouts as she was.

"Okay." She agrees and allows him to lead.

Half of the current song continues on as they sway in silence. Maybe neither of them expected for this to be how it went. Steve reacts first. He releases the hand of Darcy's that he is holding and moves it under her chin. He directs her face towards him and tilts his to move in for a kiss. She is just able to maneuver out of it and press her head to his chest to make it appear to be nothing more than friendly but affection embrace. She dares a look out to the floor. Sure enough. A handful of couples regard them warmly. Probably happy Captain America has finally found someone. She is pissed. No, being simply pissed would be downright delightful compared to what she was feeling.

"What is wrong with you?" She moves back into dancing position. He returns it but they do not move.

"I'm making a bold declaration. Right here I want to kiss the woman I love." Poor, dumb Steve. Clearly he had gotten some bad intell on mending fences.

"How dare you think you even have any right too." She slowly articulates through gritted teeth. "I am going to turn and leave. Do. Not. Follow. Me. Understood? Seriously Steve. There is so much wrong here, I don't even know where to begin." Ben, Jerry, Netflix and now wine. She needed to get home. She turned on her heal and left the dance floor. Not fast enough to draw any future attention to them but with the right body language to shame Steve right where he stood.

~*~

_"Ah, geeze! Thank God that is over! Is it just me or was that Senator's wife totally pawing at me?" Steve goes to unbutton the button of his modern dress blues jacket as they step out on to the sidewalk._

_"Uh, which one? From my vantage point you were a forbidden dessert and all of those women were on a diet... couple of the Fellas too." She winks at him. "Is it always like that? It must get old. In fact, I know it has to get old ."_

_"It took a definite adjustment for sure. I was nowhere near this build growing up. Now I kinda block it out. Only every once in a while does someone gets "handsy" like you just witnessed in there." Steve shrugs and Darcy hates that this is his norm when out on official Captain America appearances. Like everyone feels entitled to a piece of him because of who he is. "But honestly, it's always, 100% more bearable since you've started coming to these things too. You give the best 'side eye'." He laughs whole heartily and she gives him a praising smile for remembering the term she taught him the week prior. "It's just nice to look over and see a friendly, non-demanding face in the crowd. Thank you." His gratefulness genuine. She smiles back warmly._

_"Just doing my job, Cap but you're welcome just the same." She finds herself a little embarrassed still under his gaze._

_"It's more than that. You're just... well you're just something else." He says trying to find the words but nothing is missed in the delivery of what he was able conjure._

_She's more than embarrassed now, she is full on flushed. "Well, I think it's time to take my 'something else' and head home." She gestures behind her shoulder with her thumb and leans her body into the direction._

_"You're walking? It's pretty late, isn't it?" He peers into the direction in which she's pointing._

_"No, don't be silly. I'm headed to the Subway station." His eyebrows raise at that._

_"Can I, uh, walk you home?" His hands raised to start in on his neck. "I umm, would really feel better knowing you made it there safe." She steps into his space and lowers his hands for him. She's got a wicked grin spread across those enchanting lips._

_"And who exactly is going to protect me from Captain Breast?" She lets out with one eyebrow raised. Steve coughs and chokes on air. Her face falls and she goes to pat his back. "God, Steve! I was joking! Seriously man, how you going to ensure my safety if I have to stop to give you the Heimlich after a little playful banter?" Steve looks mortified. She takes pity on him. "Come on." She starts to walk ahead and turns to jerk a nod for him to follow her direction. "If I am going to have an escort, I am going to brave the mean streets for some ice cream before I go home. Let me guess... you're a vanilla man?" Her lip quirks._

_"It's an underrated flavor!" He goes to catch up._

_"You're an underrated flavor, Rogers."_

_The night carried on. If Darcy hadn't known any better she would have said it felt like a date. Not just any kind of date either. When Steve honest to goodness took of his uniform blazer and draped it over Darcy's shoulder, all while she held onto both of their ice cream cones, she swore she felt like everything she thought dating would be. Back before she became jaded and consider meeting for drinks in some bar and a little making out a acceptable form of courtship. They talked the whole way home. Darcy imagined the slow pace they kept was because neither really wanted to be done with their night together._

_He told her about his childhood friend, Bucky. The things the would get up to in the Summers and how they would pray that he made it through the Winters. She told him about New Mexico and how it changed her entire view on the World.  About how joining SHIELD was a better alternative than trying to pretend it never happen._

_When they got to her stoop they continued on and Steve went to escort Darcy all the way up the three flights of stairs leading to her front door. Now Darcy was really feeling like it was a date. The time tested "is he going to kiss me?" question started to play in the forefront of her mind, which she new was silly because it was Steve. Her friend. Her friend that did a nice thing by seeing her home safe. Her friend. Her incredibly hot, sweet, considerate and it was worth a second mention of hot, friend._

_They reached her door and Darcy turn her back to it. "So here we are..."_

_"Yep. That is your door..." Steve hands go in his pockets and he begins to roll on the balls of his feet._

_Oh yeah. He was questioning it too._

_"Oh here is your coat. Thanks by the way." Darcy goes move it from her when something catches. Steve takes a step closer to help free her._

_"Here, let me help you." He untangles her from his lapel pin and runs an hand down her now bare arm. The first rub was a friendly gesture. The second rub, a slide back up the arm, Darcy was sure was almost involuntary. By the time he turned his hand to just run his fingers, every so slightly down the length, Darcy knew he was working up to something. He swallows hard and slowly works down the length of her arm to her wrist. She stands still. So close to him with his clean scent and hard chest. All she would have to do is lean her head forward just so and she could lay her cheek onto it and press into him. Suddenly he straightens. Breaking her trance along with his own._

_"All free. Well.... Goodnight, Darce." Darcy's head is still trying to catch up. He gives her a nod and Darcy knows he is going to chicken out. She reacts quickly._

_"Uh, did you maybe want to come in? For some coffee, maybe?" Did her voice just crack like a prepubescent boy?_

_Steve almost looks relived to have been stopped. "Yeah. Coffee sounds pretty fantastic actually." His smile come easy and it's a welcome break from the sudden sexual tension._

_Darcy opens the door for them and Steve takes in the room and he enters. "I like your place, Darce. It's really... you." He means it, she can tell. She know he means it as a compliment. Darcy did always like to decorated like she talked; loudly and full of interesting tid-bits. She want's to fully enjoy him enjoying her space but by this point, her pulse has begun drumming in her ears and she her stomach is tied in knots. She knew she was either going to have to take a leap or find away to forget all about it.... Leap it was._

_She turns. Nerves and adrenaline pushing the words forward. "You know I didn't really invite you in for coffee, right?"_

_"Oh thank God!" Steven lets out a loud sigh of relief and closes the space between them. Quickly his hand is in her hair, at the back of her neck and bringing her in for a heated kiss. His other arm wrapping around her waist and lifting her slightly so he is granted better access to take full advantage of her permission. Her arms wrap around his shoulder. Then she brings her hands to cup his face. Then they are in his hair, across his back, on his chest. They circle around and make the path again. She can't decide where she likes touching him most._

_He sets her back on her feet and it frees them both up to explore even more. Steve seems to be rather fond of Darcy's hips. They way he alternates between smoothing his hands over them to tightening his grasp to pull her closer into him. When he does she can feel his hard length press into her. She was totally making out with STEVE! Oh Mama! What a great kisser?! I mean sure, he always had those full, soft looking lips but totally unassuming compared to what the could do in action. 'Focus Darcy!' All though she was making out with Steve. Her friend. Her hot, kind, sweet and HOT friend... and NOW he was picking her up. Oh my Odin, he totally just ran a hand over her butt and down her thighs and was picking her up to wrap her legs around his lean little waist to carry her further into the room. 'Loki, come on back and conquer Earth for all I care. I think my life just peaked!'_

~*~

"For a supposed Military man, you're not that stealthy! I knew you were following me from the second I hit the pavement outside the venue!" Darcy shouts at Steve through the door. He has yet to knock. Unsure of how to begin.

"Stealth is reserved more for Clint or Natasha. I wanted to make sure you made it home safe." He lies into the door.

"Safe and sound. Goodnight Captain!" She isn't giving him anything.

"Darce..." He braces himself on either side of the frame and leans his head towards the door. Silence greets him. "Darcy, please? May I come in?"

"No." It's crisp.

"Look, I promise, after I say all that I want you to hear, if you want to continue to hate me you can. I won't stop you from moving on. I just want to the chance to tell you. I will say it all right here. Every bit. Though, I can hear Mrs. Higgings from down the hall coming to her peephole. I don't mind if she hears nearly as much as I know you do. Plea...." Steve stops once her hears her begin undoing the slide lock.

She opens the door but does not move to make way for him. She stands there expectantly.

"Hi." He says. Her face further presses expectantly. "I am sorry." It's weak and a pathetic offering for what needs to be said. "I wasn't lying, what I said about Mrs. Higgings. May I come in?" She finally moves but nothing in her body language offers anymore. He takes in her small apartment. They didn't spend anywhere near the amount of time here as they had Steve's place but now he wishes they had. The bright, colorful knick-knacks remind him so much of the vibrancy she brings to the world. 

"If you're waiting for me to start things off, to save you, you're sadly mistaken. I don't offer that kind of service anymore." She stands with her back to the now shut door. She is facing him with her arms crossed.

"This one is all on me. I know that. Darcy, you gotta know, the things that I said? All of that. I didn't mean any of it." At that she moves towards him. Fist balled and anger worn on her face. 

"But you said them, Cap! You said them and you knew it would hurt me!" Her fist pounding into his chest much like someone begging to be let into a door. Begging for her words to be let in. "Don't you dare stand there and tell me you love me and you didn't mean it because you still SAID THEM!" Her final pound coming out much weaker but it didn't matter because at that Steve quickly grabbed both wrist and roared.

"I HAD TO!" The shout rendering both of them still. "I had to..." It almost came out as a whimper. "If I hadn't pushed, you would have stayed and I would have let you. You would have been you and everything about you that is so wonderful and made me fall in love with you. You would have tried to understand. You maybe even would have understood, for all I know. But I had to think of you. You shouldn't be with me. You deserve so much more that what being with me would bring." His head low now. Still holding her wrist.

"And what would being with you 'bring' exactly, Steve?" She is collected again and she doesn't buy it.

He slowly dropped her wrist and let them fall to her side. He turns. His hand working at his neck while he found a seat perched on the edge of her coffee table, still facing her. Hunched over, he rest his elbows on his thighs and immersed himself in the task of examining his hands.

A long minute ticked by.

"Your birthday. Man, I already knew I was a goner for you. Did you know that? You were... you are just so amazing. I had this whole night planned out. Seems so stupid now. I was going to take you out. Properly show you how I felt you deserve to be treated. Then..." He laughs. "Then I was going to ask you to be my girl." He laughs again. "Like we don't live the lives that we do. Like we could be normal. I'm a Goddamn idiot. 

The mission I was on. There was this group. We had reason to believe they had been collecting information on SHIELD agents. It was unsure as to what they had planned for it but we needed to strike anyways. I, uh, got into the room. There were all these pictures." He lets out a puff of a laugh. "It kinda reminded me of all those God awful, melodramatic crime dramas you always made me watch." His lips still in a oddly timed smile like his memory of them curled up and watching b-list movies outweighed the subject matter. "Then. Then it was you. You were every single picture in this disgusting space. They followed you everywhere. They knew you were with me. There was a picture of you leaving my place. I was the reason you were on that wall."

"Steve. You really believe that? That any of that was your fault?" She hasn't moved but her face has softens.

"I killed him, Darcy. I was so worked up that I threw him into a wall and the impact killed him." His palms out and a soft expression of exasperation on his face. "I didn't mean to but I have yet to feel any real remorse. I know it's because I knew from that moment on, no matter what I did, I couldn't keep you safe. I would only further make you a target" She goes to protest. He can feel it. She is going to do as she always does. She was going to try to understand and reason. He puts up a hand to stop her. He brings a hand up and rubs his face slow and firm. He let's out another out of placed smile. "And I come home and you have no idea this is going on. You're just buzzing with energy and talking about the crossword puzzle of all things. We ran into that Agent, you remember that?" He looks at her.

"Cindy." She nods.

"Yeah. Cindy.

You were so worried about being seen as some social climber. I just sat there knowing I would kill again to keep you safe and you were afraid to be seen with me. We were far from the same page, we were in different books in different libraries. I knew I could use it as an out. I made the resolve that I could learn to love you and not be with you than have something happen and not have the choice.

If I were to have that choice taking away from me, Darce? If something like that should happen? I don't think I..." His voice caught and he stopped. The weight that he wears so obvious now. She doesn't say anything. She moves quickly and drops to her knees in front of his bent knees. She makes her way into the space between his legs and hugs him. She embraces him. She silently invites him to share the burden

~*~

_He pulls away from her. His face searching her for signs they should stop. Or at the very least slow down. She looks ravished. Her hair mussed, lips engorged and bright with an undercurrent of blood. She pulls those same tools of temptation into a broad, confident smile._

_He tasks his cue. He carries her further into the living space. She nods down a small hall. "My room's down that way." It doesn't come out like a question. Not even a proposition. It was a statement. A statement from a confident, modern day women. Steve was coming around to these new social norms. Especially when it meant he was going to get to get closer to Darcy. He had wanted this for months. Somewhere around the second month after meeting her, he had resigned himself to the possibility that he would never work the courage to work up to anything. By the third month, he was pathetic. Darcy had invaded his thoughts over the last few months.The ability to focus when Darcy was in the same room was becoming dangerous. He had wanted so badly the chance to touch her, feel her, know her. Though the possibility of this being a means to an end left him troubled, he pushed any doubts and followed her lead and carry her down the way not breaking any of the kissing.  He was three steps further to nirvana when she stopped him. "Wait! Shit. Shit, shit. Wait." She let out a sigh. "I wasn't really expecting company. It's a disaster zone in there. Uh, it may even be a disaster zone....'down there.'" She frees her hands long enough to pointedly aim both index fingers to her sensitive lady parts when making the double whistle sound effect._

_"Seriously?" Really, what was he suppose to say to all of that? "Okay?..." These modern women were weird as they were bold._

_"Here. Put me down." He reluctantly lowers her and helps her steady herself on her feet. "Have a seat out here and gimme just a few minutes. Fifteen, tops!" She went up on her toes to deliver a kiss to his cheeks. "You're the best! Thanks! Be back in a jiff! Is that from 'your time'?'"  Why did everyone say "your time"? Before he could ask aloud she was off down the hall and he heard a door close. Slammed almost. Was that a squeal?_

_He smiled to himself and made a investigating round around the room. Darcy's energy was everywhere. His eyes fell onto a bulletin board. Picture of Darcy laughing, smiling, living life. Pictures with friends and family. One of Darcy, Jane and Dr. Selvig, who Steve had recognized from the invasion. The three of them stand in the dessert and a beautiful sunset behind them. Like the whole sky was on fire._

_"Son of a Mother! That's gonna scar!" The water was running from the back of the apartment but Steve had very little idea as to what was going on behind the closed door. He carried on his self guided tour._

_Next her bookshelf. A testament to her love of all things books. Every few punctuated with a small tokens. Little treasures to her, he is sure of it. A heart shaped stone. An "I heart New York" snow globe and an Iron Man action figure bent over with his bum in the air. His lip pulls in a smirk. What was he doing?_

_He walks over to the very small loveseat. What was he thinking? He was going to rush to the bedroom with Darcy? He hadn't even taken the time to congratulate himself that, on some level, she was willing to return his affections. It wasn't just the idea of getting naked with her. He wanted to just be in her presence. He wanted to talk to her, joke with her. He wanted to brush a hair back as she told him about her day chasing Avengers about the tower and juggling her SHIELD paperwork. He wanted anything physical to evolve slowly. He wanted to take his time the first time he made love to her. He was going about all of this all wrong. He didn't want Darcy to be that kind of girl._

_His hand working at the back of his neck. Few more long minutes ticked by as he decided what he was going to do when she came back out. He had yet to form a plan when she emerged. Her face was still flushed. She wore a mischievous grin and the way she made her way over to him could only be described as sauntering. Damn it. He wanted to touch her. He wanted to run his hands over her bare skin. He didn't want to wait. Though, He knew he should wait._

_"Hey there." She breaths as she makes it over to him. Swaying into his knees as he sits of the small couch's cushion._

_Forget it. Forget everything. He wanted her, damn it!_

_"Hey yourself." He brings up hand and pulls her so is able to straddle his lap._

_Only in the swift movement Darcy manages to bring a knee straight to his "American Dream"._

_"Oh God! Oh God!" I am SO SORRY! Are you OKAY?!" Darcy is shouting at him and Steve is curled into his lap. He is putting a hand up for the international symbol of I am going to pretend everything is fine and I am not literally curled over in pain because this is inconceivably awkward. Yet, he is also doing it because he can't seem to manage any words. That really straight shot to the junk. "ICE! You're going to need ice!" Darcy rushes off towards the kitchen. She comes back with what looks to be a back of frozen blueberries. She goes to place them on to his lap for him but as flustered as she is, she drops them right onto his wounded soldier._

_"OWW!" There came the words. "Oww." A more human sounding level of noise. "Thank you." A cleared throat. "Thanks, Darcy. I can take it from here." He adjust the bag and makes room for her to sit beside him. She is stiff and perched on the edge of the cushion._

_"Hey. It's okay. Super strength, remember? I'll, ahhh..." He shifts to better face her. "... be good as new before you know it."_

_She looks at him. Her eyes large and sincere in apology. "I know. I am just having a really hard time not making a 'Cap'sicle' joke with the makeshift ice pack pressed into you like that." She is struggling with keeping her face passive._

_"Now that hurts. Get over here you evil woman." He tosses the bag behind his shoulder and goes to make his way over to her while simultaneously pulling her over to him. He very carefully lifts her and personally shifts her into place so she is now in his original intended position with both knees on either side of him and straddling his thighs. The skirt of her dress riding further up her own thighs. She smirks all the way through the placement but doesn't fight it. She almost looks coy, almost. They way she shifts into his lap, easy enough not to injure but deliberate enough to show it is exactly where she wants to be. He sits up straight and draws he in for a deep kiss. She begins to move in to his lap and he makes a grimace and pulls back a bit. "Yeah, I heal fast but not that fast. Might wanna give that a little more time there." She looks embarrassed. "How about we focus on you for the time being, huh?" At that her smile returns and he runs soft hand up her arms, over her shoulder and lays them on her upper back and guides her down to his mouth as he sits further back into the couch. He brings and hand to the zipper on her high backed dress and begins to bring it down faster than could be considered a slow seduction. The need for her was growing in intensity._

_"MY HAIR! OWW, CAP! OWW! OWW!" He is smacked in the face with her forehead instinctively trying to move away from the trap. He tries to counter by quickly moving the zipper back the way it came. That only seemed to make the whole thing worse. She is now completely caught up in the stiff metal zipper and appears to be in genuine pain. Her voice uncharacteristically not her own as she balls up and tucks into his chest and pleads with him to undo it. "Cap. You gotta untangle me. I think it's pulling my hair out when I move." He wants to help her and fast. He take dress on either side of the zipper and pulls it apart quickly. The freedom come as a euphoric relief for her and she stays with her forehead to his chest and remains silent. They sit there for a moment longer. She the holds the ripped dress to her chest and slides to sit beside him but still tucked into his side. She pats his knee. "Maybe this is all a sign, Steve. Maybe we shouldn't..." She trails off. He gives a defeated sigh of agreement._

_"Darcy, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even let things get this far.." He begins._

_"What? Yeah, making out with a extremely attractive Super Soldier was a real hardship, Rogers. Has anyone ever told you that you're too guilt ridden?" There she goes calling 'em as she sees 'em. He turns his head to look down at her. She is looking right back at him. Something so familiar and accepting in her face._

_He leans down into her. His kiss this time met with soft, sincere return. It feels right. It continues. The affection only grows._

_The kissing becomes need. Need becomes action. It is not long before Steve is carrying Darcy, once more towards her room._

~*~

It is unknown how much time has ticked by with Darcy kneeling in front of Steve. How long she spent embracing him. It wasn't a scorned lover rekindling a romance. It wasn't a plea for Steve to come to his senses. It was friend letting another friend lean on her. She cared for Steve and his well being no matter what had come of them and the things that they weren't.

She was the first to pull back. She gave a nurturing rub to the outside of his arms and looked at his face. Really looked at his face. Steve, always so guilt ridden. She made her way to her feet and cleared a space from his slumped body for her to sit with her profile to him on his bent legs while he stayed sitting on the edge of the coffee table. He was quick to enclose her in his arms, gently coming together outside the side of her hips. She placed a soft hand splayed on the back of his head and drew him to rest a cheek of her bosom. Her cheek going to the top of his head. Her fingers beginning in on his hair.

"I'm sorry. I do not have any magical run of the mouth to fix what you're feeling. I wish I did." She knew Steve's silence conveyed he had a long head start on it all and even he, didn't have anything to offer. ".... Though... If I were to be completely honest, I think my safety is a complete bullshit reason to dump a girl. Well... me, anyways." He went to meet her eyes with a disappointed Captain America scowl. She just shrugged. "I am not pretending to know what you're processing but come on! I'm a tough cookie. Not too mention, who is better protected than the chick sleeping with Captain America, huh? I know you want me safe but I know you would have kept me safe. Whatever I couldn't have done for myself. Also, I really like my chances with the whole freaking Avengers team as my co-workers, don't you? I know that makes me a target but I would say the ass who stole my cab this morning was in more danger of my raft than I am of getting mixed up in the Super Villain du jour's crazy schemes. I love my job. I am going to continue doing it. You treating me like a delicate glass doll is only going to leave you pinning and super butt-hurt when I eventually find a brave enough fellow who wants to help me take on the crazy and get with this." She swipes a hand down the full length of herself. "I feel bad for you but you kinda brought it on yourself."

"I don't want you to find someone else." He manages sheepishly. "I am..." She cuts him off abruptly.

"No? Well that's what people get when they break things off and try to burn the bridge on the way out. You don't get it both ways, Steve. You can't keep me near and push me away. I am not missing out on the chance to become a free agent again because you're too afraid of my safety to take us out of neutral."

"Let me get a word in edgewise, would ya?!" Oh. This was strong voice. " I haven't even said I'm sorry yet... I am. I am sorry. I just want you safe. I need you safe. I went about it in the worst way imaginable... I am sorry Knowing that I had hurt you? I was having a hard time living with that. I can only imagine what it was like being on the receiving end. I keep thinking how bad I screwed up, how I could have avoided it all by trusting you. The way you tackle emotions. I may never be on your level with that. I have to be honest. I'm sorry, though."

She presses her forehead into his and scratches behind his ear. Much like a Golden Retriever. Poor fellow. She doesn't mean to needle it in further by drawing it out and staying silent. He just seems so helpless. I mean what was that, like 6 "sorry"?

"I'm not THAT good at it. The emotions. It took Tony meddling, actually in a totally non-Tony way, for me to realize, or maybe just admit, that I was in love with you." She offered. "Don't add emotional savant to the pedestal next to 'possible Damsel in Distress' title, okay? That is the last thing we need if we were going to move pass this together."

He looks up at her. "You want to move pass this? Together, I mean?"

She shruggs again. "Do I trust you're smart enough not to fumble this up so bad in the future? No. However, I am confident in my thinking that you got a taste of my resilience to be appropriately afraid that I won't be doling out third and fourth chances. That should keep you in line." She chuckles and it softens the delivery of the threat. 

He is kissing her before she can wipe the Natasha like smirk of her face. His hands cupping her face. She wobbles a little on his knees but for the most part, it feels good to be home. 

He completes the kiss and while still cupping her face, looks deep into her eyes. "I promise you. I will spend the rest of my life making sure I don't need a third chance."

"Cheese and Rice, Steve!" The heel of her palm shoots up to press into her eye and she rubs slowly. Steve's hands have since dropped.  "Seriously. Do you hear yourself? The rest of your life? For the love of Odin... this, allll of this." She swipes a finger back and forth in the air between them. "Has been so out of order from the start! I am not asking you to marry me! How about a date?!" She throws her hand up in exaggerated exasperation.

"A date?" He is tentative and she fears he thinks it's a trap.

"Yes, a date. Like beginning of a relationship type thing." She nudges into him.

"Okay." He is clearly plotting a course of action.

"Okay." She allows him space to plan.

"Darcy, would you let me take you out? On a date?" No sure-footed Captain voice there. Seriously, Steve?

 "Okay." She smiles into it.

"Okay?"

"Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANKS EVERYONE!
> 
> I feel like I learned a bit to take with me. I have an idea of what I would like to stay with my style and what I would kick to the curb.
> 
> All in all, this was really fun!
> 
> I love to hear from you. And thanks to those who have been commenting along the way.


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